WOOTTONS

Huppy Valentime's Dey!

2012-02-14T16:29:00.010-07:00

Is it just me or did Valentine's stop becoming a huge deal after marriage? Just me? Oh, okay nevermind then.

Today has been great. I have been doing everything in the name of Valentine's day, because it makes it seem more special.

I got Atrion dressed in his Valentine outfit for the day and we headed out on a mother-son Valentine date. I took him to the mall and got him a Valentine treat.

I got a Valentine diet coke and chocolate cookie.

To his delight, we rode the escalators twice! Because it's Valentines, and why not? The carousel that I really wanted to let Atrion ride only takes cash, so instead we went to this smaller one where you can swipe your debit card. And honestly, I think he had more fun on this one anyway.

I know it doesn't seem like he is having more fun, but that's because he is pretending to be a pirate, DUH!
Little know fact about Pirates: They growl like tigers.
After the boat ride, we sauntered over to the kids area past Forever 21, past Wet Seal with their clearances, and finally, past Godiva chocolates with all the desperate men trying to get last minute presents for their wives or girlfriends or mothers. I had a good chuckle. There were lots of kids for Atrion to play with. We stayed so long (his Valentine's present from me) that we went through three waves of kids. He made three different friends. The first was a boy who jumped off the slide and pig with him.

The second was a girl who wanted him to chase her (ah, young love).

And the third was a hyper little boy who ran around with Atrion blowing raspberries. Atrion laughed hysterically every time. It was so cute.

In between the friend trades, Atrion would do a little jig.

We had lunch at the mall. Atrion had Wendy's and I had Bourbon chicken. Mmm....
Halfway through eating, Atrion started getting antsy which is not unusual. He crawled under the table and was playing with his kids meal toy. Suddenly he said "I don't have to go poop" which means he does, but that its too late. And then there was the smell. I had to get him out of there quick. I forgot diapers and wipes, and all the changing stations were full, so we booked it to the car and headed home. Poor kid.
We made it though, and I started a bath for him. A Valentine's bath. He got to play in the tub for about an hour because he loves it so much.

I went to run a quick errand and decided to pick up Breaking Dawn to watch and a few donuts for my Valentine boys. This is the best donut ever. It's called the New Orleans.

Cody cooked some amazing chinese food, but we had to wait to eat it due to a fridge problem that needed cleaned out and sanitized immediately. Now we are settled in for the night watching the movie and about to play some games. Hoorah for Valentine's Day! It's basically like every other day, only more pink.

This is what's up.

2012-02-11T17:15:00.010-07:00

So, winter finally arrived! It's nice. I feel good about it. I love sweater weather and the South doesn't get too much of that. The bare trees and the crisp breeze were heavenly today.
I got up with Atrion this morning so Cody could sleep in. Then we traded off at about 10:00 and I got to take a two hour nap. Atrion played with some toys he got from his Grammy for Valentine's Day. There are Wikki Stix, cupcake and kisses window clings, Toy Story Valentine's cards, veggie magnets, some pants, a sticker book and a Toy Story Poster! What a nice Grammy!
After that,we got dressed and journeyed to Barnes & Noble to spend my 20% discount. The kids sections has a neat Thomas the Train display complete with the railways and little trains for the kids to play with. Atrion was in heaven.

We looked around for a bit and Cody found a great book about a boy and his dragon. I left it in Atrion's room and he is sleeping, otherwise I would know the title. I also got a hot chocolate and we all split a huge chocolate chunk cookie. Fantastic!
Atrion looks so cute when he falls asleep in the car. His little lips poke out in a frownie face. I just want to munch on him.

After we got home and got settled in, I made some cupcakes. After all our trips to the bakery for a cupcake or two every week, I decided it is time for me to make my own. So I decided that I would first try to perfect the frosting recipe first and then focus on the cake. So I used a chocolate cake mix this time and worked on the frosting. I used the recipe found here and added fresh raspberries to it. It has a lightness like whipped cream and a soft sweetness. The raspberries were a perfect touch, if I say so myself.
I had Cody try the first one, and was so happy that he said it was delicious. He even said it is comparable to Muddy's. I will take a bow now.
I did a happy jig for finding a good frosting recipe on the first try. Thank you Shauna Sever.

I have also been taking pictures like a mad woman using my iPad. I am pretty sure everyone on Facebook and Instagram will get very bored very fast.

In other news, I haven't lost weight in 2 weeks. Surprise!! You might be inclined to blame the cupcakes and donuts and cookies, but I actually think it's the diet soda. I became addicted to diet soda after allowing myself to drink it instead of regular soda. Before that I was losing 2 lbs a week. I think there is a strong link between diet soda and craving carbs and junk food. I feel more hungry on the days I drink the soda and so I probably eat more too. I haven't gained any weight back, but I haven't lost any either.

So, my new resolution for next week is to cut down to one soda a day, every other day if possible. I still got a ways to go to get down to 125.

ikˈsplôr

2012-02-10T12:22:00.004-07:00

Wednesday's seem to always fall flat for me. Mondays are family home evening, Tuesdays are family movie nights (kinda dropped the ball on that one the past little bit), Thursdays are our date night, and Fridays are Cody's game night as well as Atrion and Mom night. But Wednesdays....nuthin. However, this past Wednesday I convinced Cody that we needed Papa Murphy's pizza for dinner and that he needed to come with me to get it. And he did! I win! In Memphis, it takes 20 minutes to drive 7 miles. It was after 4 so the traffic was rough, but it is so much better driving at a snail's pace when you have someone to talk to. Atrion fell asleep in his chair while we chatted about the meaning of life and happiness.

I am always surprised by the lack of lines at this Papa Murphy's. It's the only one within 50 miles of us, but no one is ever there. I guess it isn't as popular down here as up North. It still tastes just as good though. When we pulled into the parking lot Cody noted that there was a pie shop a few doors down from Papa Murphy's. I was aghast! How could I not have noticed this the several other times I have been here. I used to think I was so observant. Cody proves me wrong on a daily basis just solely on how observant he is. While we were waiting for our pizzas to get made, we wandered over to the pie shop. The aromas were heavenly. They had window cases filled with pies and cookies. And we got to try samples! I love samples!! We ended up buying Slap Yo Mama Chocolate Pie!

I have never been a big pie fan. This pie changed all of that. It is amazing. There is a a thin, crispy layer between the chocolate and the whip cream. Everything is decadent and rich. Mmmmm....so good. It is pricey though. It was $10.00 for half a pie! Almost $20.00 for a whole one! Yeesh! It was nice to try something new and explore part of this city with Cody.

This is a picture of my boys, stuffed to the rafters. Atrion needed to let it all hang out, I guess.

SO, I think maybe Wednesdays will be my "Observant Day". I will try and look more closely at things on this particular day and make better use out of my surroundings. Or maybe it can be my try-something-new day. Or both! Whatever.

2012-02-09T17:58:00.001-07:00

Holy crudités! I bought an iPad 2! I am enjoying it immensely. I am blogging on it right now!! So far I have done my homework with it and taken lots of pictures so I could toy around with instagram and pixlr- something- or- other.
Today I took Atrion to Hernando so he could hang out with cousin Carter for a bit. I was waiting at the school to pick up Carter and Atrion started snoring. It was pretty adorable.
Once I feel inspired to lug out my laptop and camera I will blog about some fun stuff we did yesterday. It might be awhile because after playing on this bad boy my laptop seems way too huge.

Cuz tonight's gonna be a good, good night....

2012-02-08T19:15:00.010-07:00

Yesterday I had a girl's night with my sister and BFF Laura Deanna Van Noy. Cody was wonderful and watched Atrion early so I wouldn't be home too late or miss out on any fun.
I met Laura at the Hyat motel and we had Bahama Breeze, I think? It was delicious. We had clam chowder, lobster quesadillas, coconut shrimp, and a sea food-y goat cheese dip that was delicious. We got stuffed to the rafters and then headed over to the mall. The Wolfchase. My favorite.

Sephora is pretty dangerous. I could spend boat loads in there without even blinking. I didn't though, because I am responsible-ish. Instead, I just got some eye liner and lip gloss. This lip gloss is A-mazing. Buxom in creamsicle.

I got Atrion some rad shoes from Rack Room and Cody a new game from Gamestop. And after choking on the fumes seeping out of Abercrombie and Fitch, we made our way to Forever 21 and Wet Seal. I got some very cute items for super cheap. Check out this alarm clock necklace. It's similar to the one I bought, only I think mine is way cuter and $4.00 cheaper...

I got some way cute t-shirts. Did you know that red is not in season? Apparently I am so inept at fashion that I did not know this, but don't worry the girl at Aeropostale was nice enough to inform me before I embarrassed myself in other stores. After we made a detour into Build-A-Bear so that Laura could get a little present for herself (a bunny named LaLa). Ain't she cute?

We got pretty silly and recorded ourselves doing the Ellen Degeneres Dance Challenge. Laura has the videos on her camera but you can check out this guys wicked moves here. It was a lot of fun.
After that we headed over to the trusty old Barnes and Noble. I got a couple fun little items here too. I love a good surprise and so I am drawn towards these Lego guys that you buy but you don't know which figure you are going to get.

So far, we got a clown that comes complete with a pie, a sleepyhead in pajamas with a teddy bear, and a girl that is some sort of space ranger with a lazer gun. Her hair switches out for a helmet too. Rad. Anywho, I can't resist buying one. Last night, I got this sweet little dude:

I named him Pablo. Pablo the Enforcer. That's his gladiator name.
Much to my surprise, while Laura was on the phone dealing with a tenant, I found another random fun thing. They sell keychains that are shaped like food, only they are extremely happy and have eyes. You don't know which you will get. I was hoping for a muffin because it looked like a cupcake(and if you haven't noticed, I am kind of addicted), but I got an orange instead. A much healthier option, but cute nonetheless. Here is my picture. Don't let it fool you, it is a rather well made piece of art and is fuzzy on it's backside. His name is Jose. I was channeling some Latino vibes, I think.

On the way out Laura found some finger sumo wrestlers that I am very jealous of. And I accidentally saw Marilyn Monroe naked and let out a yelp that attracted the attention of the folks quietly sipping their lattes and lookin' at their books. Poor Norma Jean. What a life! Another story, another day.
About this time, my feet fell off so Laura carried me piggy back style to the car. Okay, not really, but I was complaining a lot about my feet so we left and headed to ....DADADA! Joe's Crab SHACK!!! Can I get a MMMmmmm?!?! Mmm....

I had a lot of fun using Picnik on this last picture. That's why I look crazy. Alright, I can't blame it all on that, but it is part of it. That and the delicious food. And Coke Zero.
On a side note, here is a list of things I am addicted to:
~Diet Coke
~Cupcakes
~Chips and Salsa
~Cheese
~Raspberry cream Hershey kisses
~Sweet and Sour Chicken from Yum's
~Sandwiches.
~Shopping

Here's to an amazing day!

2012-02-07T07:57:00.008-07:00

Yesterday was an awesomely busy day! When Atrion and I woke up we got dressed and decided it was a day for adventure. First we stopped at Target, because that's where every great adventure begins.
I had a mini shopping spree consisting of bathroom decorations, organizational shelves, and a rug. Also, Atrion got Woody to go with Buzz. (Yes, he has been pretty spoiled).

After we loaded up our goods into the car, we did a quick errand and then headed to a new park I found close by. It's right next to the huge, nice library (which doesn't open until 10:00!?!?!, so I thought Atrion could play for a bit and then we would go get some books. Atrion was so excited to play at the park.

You see that slide in front there? The one that looks fun and inviting to a young boy of just 2? Yeah, that slide ruined our plans. Turns out, it rained a few nights ago and this slide sneakily holds a gallon of water at the bottom of it so that whoever unwittingly slides down will be immediately soaked and cold. Poor Atrion. He was torn between wanting to play some more and the fact that he was suddenly, inexplicably drenched. I had to rush him back to the car and get him out of his wet clothes and wrapped in a warm blanket. He still has remnants of the cold we suffered from for two weeks and I was not taking chances. We were at the park a total of 5 minutes. Needless to say, Atrion was devastated. I let him lament on the ride home. Woody was a great comfort.
When we got home and got Atrion settled down, I started in on a rather huge task. I reorganized Atrion's room, the back room, the bathroom, and my room. It took all day. It was fun. I enjoyed every minute of it, no joke.
Here are some before and after shots. Keep in mind that I am not an interior designer by any means so it isn't going to look like a magazine (Oh, how I wish, but I am definitely happy about it.

I love the white rugs. I think it brightens and freshens up the bathroom. Cody wasn't thrilled, but I think he'll come around. I am not going to miss the brown on brown that's for sure.

This is my favorite. We decided to just make the back room a play room for Atrion. We took out all the toys from his room and moved them in to the back room. He tends to not go to sleep or take a nap because he is too busy playing. He actually took a nap yesterday! It worked! And the back room is much more inviting and fun. In case you are wondering, those blue totes are filled with dvd cases and cd cases that we threw away. I got a 300 slot binder to keep them all in so now they take up 5x less room.
The white desk got moved into my bedroom.

I got rid of the bookshelf and that other shelf thingie. All my books are relocated to a shelf in my closet. The bookshelf, Atrion's clothes dresser, and numerous other objects are going to make their way to Goodwill sometime today. It feels so much better to me. The next thing I need to do is to reorganize the kitchen but that is such a huge task. It will have to wait while I recuperate.
While I was working, I was thinking how good chinese food sounded but I never said anything. Then Cody says "Dinner's Ready" and I come out to this:

Homemade General Tso's chicken. It was AMAZING!!!! So delicious. Cody is just awesome. I love him.
After I ate dinner I spent 3 hours doing homework and watching The Bachelor. Then headed to bed. I probably should do better at my schooling. I just lost motivation for it for a bit but now I am more energized and can dedicate my mind to it.
See? What an awesome day. Today will be good too!

Car tags, Cheese dogs, and donuts.

2012-02-05T15:24:00.009-07:00

Saturday was such a good day. This might come as a surprise to you, but I have fallen in love with Memphis again. Atrion and I have been exploring the city and enjoying all that it has to offer, and it, well...it just happened. I realized I love driving to the humongous mall where I can buy nice things for my boy (and myself), and then stopping to get delicious donuts or cupcakes at great places, and then picking up some grub from one of the billions of places that serves delicious food. All in one swoop. I don't have to go out of my way to get anywhere, because it's all HERE! Okay, you get what I am saying. I am a cheater. I am cheating on Idaho. I still love Idaho, but I can't wait forever can I? The timing is all wrong. It's not you, it's me. We can still be friends, right?

Calvin and Hobbes, getting ready to go pick up our Tennessee car tags. After we got our car tags, we decided to celebrate. Besides paying off the rest of our loan, that was the last thing we had to do to own our car. WOOT! So we headed to 5 Guys, of course!

I am so happy for Cody that there is a 5 Guys here. He wants so few material things that it makes me look like a selfish troll. I am glad he has this. Also that, my friends, is a cheese dog with mayo, grilled onions, and grilled mushrooms. Delish. And a Diet Coke. Mmmm. I get it every time since I got it the first time. Also, as a plus, they use Idaho potatoes and write down the city where they are from the day they use them. One time it was Shelley, Idaho and I almost hugged the big ugly bags of potatoes just to smell the Idaho dirt.

Atrion ate his entire little cheeseburger. And bit Cody's finger on accident.

I don't usually brave the supermarkets on Saturdays but I have become addicted to Diet Coke, and so I needed some. Also, Atrion ran out of blueberries. And we needed cheese. Obviously it was necessary. And, because our good luck is returning to us once again the store was practically empty! Check out Atrion's sweet ride that he stayed in for 4.8 minutes. Nice....

On a whim, we stopped by Gibson's donuts hoping they had a good selection after the Saturday morning rush. The New Orleans donuts are exquisite. They are thick and fat and buttermilky. Sort of a salty sweet. In a good way. An addicting way. I didn't get a picture of them though.

Reader, meet blueberry stuffed donut and old fashioned glazed. You're welcome.

In My Purse...

2012-02-05T12:40:00.002-07:00

In those fancy women magazines they sometimes invite really famous, important people to display what they have in their purse for all to see and mimic. I thought it would be fun to look back in a few years and say...Whoa! I used to carry all that crap around? So here is the stuff in my purse.
(*DISCLAIMER: I removed all the receipts, loose change, pieces of trash, and rogue fruit snack pieces.)

1. Bottled Water (usually from Costco or Kroger)$.79 2. Kindle $200.00 with green leather cover $54.00 3. Ipod Touch $199.00 with embroidered case from love, Maude on Etsy $23.00 4. Sunglasses from Pay less $5.99 5. Vintage looking notebook I found from a discount store- can't remember the name, but there were three for $5.00, the pen I stole from Cody...so FREE! 6. cupcake i-clips from Peter Pauper $5.99 7. Keys to my Xterra $10,000.00 (that stop sign key chain is one my dad gave me for Christmas quite a few years ago...it's Homestar Runner) 8. Coach makeup bag $29.00, Revlon pink lipstick $7.99, Bath and Body Works Island Margarita Hand sanitizer $1.99, Melaleuca mint chapstick SPF15 $3.00, Cinnamon lip plumper gloss $5.99, Melalueca hand lotion $6.00, hair ties, a mirror with my name on it from Laura, and a little lalaloopsy sheep pencil topper 9. Butterfly wallet from Maurices $14.99

Wow! Look at all that stuff!

February Photo Challenge: #3

2012-02-03T19:38:00.001-07:00

Hands

Atrion's Date Night

2012-02-03T18:56:00.005-07:00

I woke up this morning feeling so tired. I could barely keep my eyes open. I still have the head cold and I guess my body was just trying to fight it off. At about 10:00 am my wonderful son started acting crazy. He was probably going stir crazy being quarantined and all. I was too tired to do much so Cody said I should go rest up for about an hour and then I could take over after that.

Well....four hours later I was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. I probably would still be asleep if Cody hadn't gently nudged me awake. I got dressed and decided it was time for a date with my son. Colds or no colds.

So we headed to the mall where there are bound to be other desperate parents toting their sick kids around. And there was!
First, we stopped at the Build-A-Bear Workshop and Atrion made his new best friend, Hobbes.

If you have $50.00 bucks or so to spare, you should definitely do this for your kid. They get to pick out their animal, stuff it, put a heart in it (not an actual, scientific heart...this isn't Frankenstein. Think Valentine's Day), give it an air bath and brush it's fur. Then I let Atrion shop for clothes for the little guy, because you can't have a naked tiger running around. He picked out a red polo shirt, white Joe Boxer underwear, some rad shoes and sunglasses as well as some felt cupcakes. I picked out the pants, because, well there isn't anything worse than a naked tiger, except a tiger that looks drunk. Promptly after receiving his wonderful new best friend, Atrion decided he wanted a penguin, and a ball, and a smurf instead. Aww, to be two again.

After I dragged my child and his new toy from the store feeling rather embarrassed, we nudged our way into the crowded play place and I let him loose. I forgot to bring my camera. Darn. I wish I wouldn't have forgotten because Atrion turned his cute and sweet on. He took off Hobbes's shoes and then taught him how to go down the slide without being scared. They jumped off the giant pig together and crawled through the tunnels. There has never been a happier toy in all existence.
After that, he was pretty wiped. So I hurried into Forever 21, bought the first 3 things that looked cute and we headed home. Hopefully he is in a better mood tomorrow, because he was a pretty expensive date.

Photo Challenge #1 and #2

2012-02-02T20:32:00.004-07:00

My view of today:
I spent a lot of time here today. My boy, my laptop and a bottle of water.

Words:

I like how this one turned out.

My love is as a fever, longing still

2012-02-02T20:04:00.008-07:00

Did you know that if your sick toddler coughs on your face when you are giving him a good night kiss you are most likely definitely for sure getting sick too. Times that by two nights in row, and you don't stand a chance.
Unfortunately, the symptoms didn't hit me until an hour before my husband and I were supposed to go on our date. A date that has been put on the back burner for months due to child care difficulties. I made a decision: We are going on a date, Dammit!
So, Laura came and watched Atrion and once Cody got off work we headed to Pho Vietnam.

Yesss.....

This is called Pho. It is the most delicious soup in the entire world. This stuff was authentic too. Cody told me. And he knows everything. I love him. :) Anyway, about the soup. It's beef noodle soup with rice noodles, cilantro, jalepeno, mint leaves, lemongrass?, green onions, very thinly sliced beef, fresh bean sprouts, a squeeze of lemon, some hoisin sauce, and hot sauce. It's heaven and made my head and tummy feel better. As did the diet Pepsi. Mmmm...caffeine.

Yeah...It's that good.
I started to get a little bit of a fever whilst enjoying the delicious soup and Vietnamese soap operas, so we decided to cut the date short. But not before I got some more cupcakes.

I had to get a picture of the iBank and the Worldspice tower. I will miss living in a big city.

You can say it...We are adorable. I'm gonna go take some Nyquil and crash.

2012-01-31T19:34:00.010-07:00

When I was 18 I moved out of my parents house and into the dorms at ISU. I moved from the dorms to the University Courts, from the UC's to my sisters house on N. Arthur, from N. Arthur to the Green Ghettos, from the Green Ghettos to a studio on N. Arthur, from the studio back into my sisters apartment (only this time she didn't live there anymore), from my sister's apartment to my sister's house on Tahoe Place, from there back to my parents house, from my parent's house to the Summit Apartments, from Summits to Westport, from Westport to Bradford Trace, and from Bradford Trace to here. Phew! Are you still with me? That's 11 moves in 8 years. We are currently looking to move back to Idaho too. 12 moves.
I have only a handful of pictures that detail these homes. It makes me sad. I can pick out a few details in the background of a picture (because who seriously just takes pictures of their house?) but I would love to be able to go back and see my first apartment again or my dorm room. At the time, you don't think twice about it because it's where you are living and you are used to it. But as time goes on you forget about the details. And let's face it, our stuff tells almost anything you need to know about a person especially when you are in your teens and early twenties before you become married and mature and lame....I mean socially acceptable.
For example, in the ghettos, we had an arm chair with no legs, a huge dry erase board with our silly conversations written out on it to show the world how hilarious we are, a zen garden, an electric neon guitar clock, a lava lamp lamp (that's not a typo, it was a lava lamp lamp), oh! and a rotten pumpkin on our balcony that was there for months. I need pictures to remember the rest of the stuff. I know there was more. Alas, no pictures.
The studio apartment I moved into was my first unfurnished space. I had to furnish it with pieces I found as well as stuff from DI. No pictures. Not one. It was such a cute little studio. Creepy guy lived next door...but that's a different story.
I think I am getting off topic.
The point is, it would be nice to have visuals of my past and part of that is where I lived, where we lived, where Atrion lived.
So here are some photos of where we live now.
The fancy blueprint I did in Paint.

Our bedroom.

My half bath. That's right...MY!

Living room.

The boys bathroom. If we were staying longer, I would buy a shower curtain and new rugs to match the white and grey/blue.

The Cocina.

The office/ dining room

Atrion's "Man Cave"

Atrion's room...he runs this house, obviously.

Our Car

I had a dream....I think.

2012-01-27T07:01:00.003-07:00

So I had this dream last night. And since my husband is too busy with work, I am going to tell you about it instead. Then he can read it later and I won't have forgotten the details.

So in my dream I am this FBI agent working with Agent Hotchner from the show Criminal Minds in the Behavioral Analysis Unit. We are trying to track a serial killer who is actually Dennis Hopper from the movie Speed. He uses a lot of bombs and mind games. We are in a city that is a mix of what I think New York city would look like if it combined with Pocatello. If that doesn't make sense, then Welcome to my dream world! Anywho, in my dream, I am competing against another agent named Prentiss for both recognition as a great agent and Hotchner's affection. I am currently his girlfriend but Prentiss wants to usurp me. Drama! We are following clues that this serial killer left. We are in an office building that looks all rustic and fancy. Not like those boring office buildings you sometimes dream about. We get a phone call from Dennis Hopper who says he left a key for us and when we find it, one person has to go across the street and open a locked phone box that is reserved for emergency use only. We surmise that either he has placed a bomb in the building we are in, or there is a bomb in the lock box so that when you turn the key either one is rigged to explode. He is asking us to choose who to sacrifice or who to save, but we don't know which choice we are making. Well, the hot shot Prentiss finds the key (taped to the back of a SWAT officer, haha!) and then realizes that this automatically means she is chosen as the one to go open the lock box. As she prepares to cross the street, we get into a more safe position in the next building over after discreetly clearing out the citizens. Dennis Hopper gets angry when you try to save everyone so we have to be discreet. And then, TWIST! Suddenly, we realize that Dennis Hopper just wants to get me and Hotchner. And this bomb is a diversion. We have to brace ourselves for either the buidling next door to explode, or the phone bomb across the street. We tell everyone to get under tables and I huddle in a corner that seems solidly reinforced. I look at Hotchner and suddenly realize that it's Prentiss who is going to explode and I feel guilty for being so competitive. All she wanted was love. And aren't I married? Then the explosion happens and it rocks the building a little bit and I realize I was correct. Had the building exploded, it would have been more devastating. Hotchner and I run to the windows and look out at the phone box. There is just a broken phone box, and some charred brick walls with a few sputtering flames.
Hotchner grabs my hand and says "He's coming" and pulls me to the fire escape. We launch ourselves over the stair railings (which are very nice, polished mahogany wood) to the next landing and make it outside into a college campus. People are everywhere, and so we easily blend in. However, Genius Hotchner sees Dennis Hopper go into the building as we are exited and points at him and says "HA-HA!" sort of like that kid on the Simpson's. Dennis Hopper looks at us and immediately starts to chase us. I say to Hotchner "He probably wouldn't have noticed us if you hadn't said that". Apparently the thought didn't occur to him. He sobers up a bit and we start running. We are really fast but so is Dennis Hopper. I look up at the college clock tower and see that it's 4:00 pm. The last bus is leaving the campus right now! And we have to be on it! We sprint towards the bus that appeared at the end of the sidewalk. A little girls with a lunchbox and back pack gets off and the bus speeds away. We quickly reevaluate and make a jack-knife right turn into an alleyway. Classic. Suddenly, Dennis Hopper is right beside us with his arms around both of us telling us to just keep walking and pretend to be normal. The alley way turns into a street and there are lots of quaint little shops with lots of people around. It is suddenly night time. The three of us get stopped by a drunken group of men coming out of a bowling alley that is attached to a diner. They want us to go in and bowl with them. Dennis Hopper starts a fight with them and releases his grasp on me. I take the split second to run into the diner away from him and Hotchner (hopefully he understands. My husband would. I have a kid to think about!). The diner is great because if I stay low, I can hide behind the all the low walls that separate the booths. I am hunched over and sprinting at the same time, but no one really notices too much. I keep running and make it out the back door into another alley that is more of a dead end because it turns into a sort of mountain made out of lava rock, but with lots of trees and shrubs too. The inner rock climber in me launches up a steep trail and starts to climb. In the dark. I get about 50 feet up and suddenly feel the edge of a cliff. I look over the side and see houses lit up and street lights glimmering. 50 feet is a LONG way!! I have thoughts flash through my head like "Wow, I am going to die by falling off a cliff trying to escape a serial killer." I turn and look back at the diner. I decide I am probably well hidden and should just hide here. Although I do note I am wearing a neon green sweater. What a rookie mistake! As I am watching the diner, I notice that the person I thought was a restaurant worker dumping garbage is actually a really buff man stuffing two girls who are barely alive into the dumpster. The man has obviously noticed my scramble up the trail and he immediately sees an opportunity to get another victim. I am prepared to launch further up the dangerous trail if needed as he makes his way to the foot of the trail. He gets one hand hold ready and suddenly 5 or 6 guys come bursting out of random directions. One from the bowling alley. They are all buff and awesome looking. The one from the bowling alley is wearing a light blue shirt with some design and sunglasses (yep, at night). I realize it's my brother Nate! None of them see me. They just think the guy is making his escape after dumping the girls bodies. Nate basically rips the guy a new one while a few of the other guys get the girls out of the dumpster and carted to safety.
Then Nate throws the guy into the dumpster! Irony? I squeak out a small "Nate!" that manages to reach his ears. He sees me huddled all sad and scared on the trail and says "Casey?!?!" all brotherly and protective. I bound down the trail as fast as I can and make it to him. He asks "Was that guy after you?" and I say "I think so. But what's worse is there is still another serial killer after me and he has my boyfriend. And oh yeah, I work with the FBI. Please save me!"
So we walk and I tell him all about what happened and he says he didn't see them in the bowling alley so they must have went somewhere else. He promises the he and his friends will find him and "take care of it". That's when I realize that he's a werewolf. Cooooooool.
After that the dream gets hazy. I think I died, but only pretended to die so I could have the serial killer off my trail. Then Nate rips Dennis Hopper to shreds. Hotchner thinks I am dead, but a few days later I go to surprise him when TWIST! He is already seeing someone else....who is married! And they have been together for a month? Low down Hotchner, low down. Wait, aren't I married? Yup! That's when I wake up feeling happy that I don't have to feel sad about Hotchner cheating on me.

The best thing about this dream was my brother saving me and all the cool visual effects I couldn't convey through words because it would have confused you. Not that you are dumb, but that I can't write very well. So, do I have any psychoanalysis experts reading this? If so, ANALYZE! :)

Why I Hate Memphis and Other Tales.

2012-01-25T18:14:00.003-07:00

Memphis has a bad rap. It's true. There are reasons though and they aren't all Memphis's fault. For one, they were hit really hard by the recession as were a lot of other places. And B, they have high crime (although to give credit where credit is due, it has dropped a few percentage points in the murder and rape category over the last few years. Yay, Memphis!). Also, they have tornadoes and other severe weather. These are reasons why most people would never move here. However, we knew all these things and still moved into the midst of it. Why, you ask? We needed the management job Cody got and I was already working in Memphis and I actually really loved the city and it was just amazing that it all fell into place.

I still think it is amazing and I pray every night and thank my Heavenly Father for our wonderful blessings with Cody's job.

However, after I found out I was pregnant and realized I was going to have a baby in a city where I could not for the life of me find a doctor to accept Tenncare I started getting worried. That's when the bad side of Memphis roared it's ugly head at me. The miscarriage and subsequent horrific hospital fiasco only confirmed it in my head. So I made a list. To be fair, I made two lists. One, was why I hate Memphis and one was why I love Memphis. Here is list one because it trumps list two based solely on number one:
*My family is 2,000 miles away. I love them so much. I have an amazing support system cheering me on and beckoning me home back in Idaho.
*The trains. Dear Heavens! THE TRAINS!!! It is ridiculous how loud and obnoxious this train is. It runs right by our house. And I tend to think that the drivers hate ear drums and want them to die. Also, I think they save all their trips up so they can rattle on by in 15 minute intervals whenever I decide to sleep. Whether its a nap or bed time, they are honking and honking and honking. And honking.
*The noisy neighbors. Granted you can find them anywhere, but I pretend it's just a Memphis thing, because why not? We didn't sleep soundly for a whole month due in part to a squeaky mattress at all hours in the day/night from our upstairs neighbors as well as from obnoxious girl laughs that sound like a chihuahua barking at odd hours. Like 3 am. Not so odd for a college girl but very annoying for this old mama.
*The state/county/city laws and organizations as well as the people who sold their souls to work there. You already know about my Tenncare troubles. In Idaho, the DMV never has a 5 hour long line. That I know of. And while government employees are NEVER nice no matter where you are in the states, in Idaho they at least take a moment to answer your questions. Here, there are so many people they just boot you out the door if you don't have all the papers you need and then direct you to another building that is not the right one. The cycle continues in like manner.
*Bass/ Cigarettes/ Bad Drivers. In Idaho, we joke about the Utah drivers. But they at least follow a certain etiquette even if they do speed too fast on icy roads. Here, no one know how to drive. They don't know that if you drive slower than the flow of traffic then you move into the right lane. Also, the cigarettes are ridiculous. Did they not get the memo? and the bass is right there with the trains. IT's annoying and hurts my poor ears.
*Roaches. Eek.
*I can't just take a walk with my son without fearing for my life.
* I miss the mormon bubble. Plain and simple.
So that is my Memphis hater list. All in all it isn't a bad place. I actually love the entertainment and food options.

To balance the scales, here is what I love and would miss about Memphis:
*My sister and her family.
*Wolfchase Galleria. This mall is epic. It has everything a girl could want in a mall. And there are no depressing, vacant "for rent" spaces. All the spots are filled with glorious goodies my bank account can't keep up with. The Sephora is amazing and you can sample almost everything. They even have live models posing in the windows sometimes. Forever 21 is my long lost love. The mall also has a nice play area and a humongstrous food court. Atrion loves the escalators. They even have a carousel and a bouncy thing and a movie theater.
*Shelby Farms. Nuff said.
*The warmness of the winter. Although I do crave a very cold, wintry breeze now and then.
*B-B-Q!!!! YUM!
*Gibsons Donuts. I wish I could convey the amazingness of these sweet delights. They aren't just donuts...they are an event. A ritual. An addiction, maybe?
*Being two minutes from Target. Like!
*The zoo, children's museum, botanical gardens, and pink palace. In short....stuff to do!! WootWoot!
*The fancy movie theater. I like our fancy movie theater that is like 5 minutes away.

Thus is our Memphis dilemma. Love it and hate it. Love to hate it? It might be a poor scapegoat for our homesick feelings and insecurities following our loss. That's the most plausible explanation. We just want to get back into our comfort zone and feel safe and warm again. Can you blame us?

I'm just keepin' it real, yo.

2012-01-24T20:04:00.003-07:00

Right now I am watching Gossip Girl on Netflix. I know every time I turn a show on of this caliber my husband does a completely internal rolling of his eyes and wonders at my mental stability. I don't blame him. His computer is a mere two feet from the TV and so he has no choice but to watch what I unmercifully pick out. I watched all my other first picks like Parks and Rec, Raising Hope, 30 Rock, and various chick flicks. I tried to watch Bones, Jericho, One Tree Hill (the new people bug the crud out of me), and the new Criminal Minds series but none caught my interest. Gossip Girl wasn't even on my list until I saw the Kristen Bell was the voice of Gossip Girl and my interest was piqued. So I am on episode 3 and it's totally a vapid, conceited show that I sort of adore.

This show is the opposite of my existence. They are rich, trust fund kids that live in New York and basically run the place with their silly high school shenanigans. And they have awesome clothes. And they don't eat. Totally opposites.

My life, in comparison to the fake lives of these characters might seem bland. I watch the show and I let myself imagine what I would be like if I had those circumstances. I come away feeling pretty good about myself.

First off, my parents let me have freedom. I was able to choose my college and my friends and I didn't have functions to attend (except church of course).

Second, I hate showering. That's a big problem for that lifestyle. If, one day, I decide I am going to stay in my pajamas all day and veg, then I can. It's alright by me and the rest of the world. No one is following my fashion trends. I don't think. If they are they are being seriously mislead. Although yoga pants from Fred Meyer and a wonder woman t-shirt from Walmart are seriously H-O-T! Combine that with dirty hair and some cookie crumbs and you caught me on a very good day.

Thirdly, I relish the small dreams. I want a nice house with a fenced back yard and my own investment portfolio that I earned and worked for. Work just doesn't compute in this alternate reality.

One thing I do wish with all my heart though is that I could live in New York City. I want to be in the center of all the bustle. I want to walk 16 blocks to get to a fabulous store where I can afford to buy the things inside of it. I want to see famous people and movie sets. I want to eat delicious food that's the price of a kidney or at least one month's rent. Which, is also the price of a fixed rate mortgage for a 3,000 square foot house in Idaho.
The problem with this is that Cody does not, I repeat, DOES NOT want to live there at all. I don't blame him. Memphis is the biggest city we have lived in and it sucks. More on that later.
Another problem is that I don't see myself raising kids their, so the dream would have to be put on hold until said kids are grown. And then I think I would be too old for the New York life, so the urge fizzles back down as fast as it came. And I realize I am happy where I am at in my life.

Alternate Casey would be extremely fabulous though. I would live in a chic little flat with awesome, artsy furniture and crafty finds from flea markets. I would wear hipster glasses and march to work wearing red lisptick and high heels. That's right, alternate Casey can wear heels and pull of red lipstick. My hair would automatically curl in that vintagey way that is so trending right now. The work I would be marching to, with an umbrella of course, is completely interesting and I can say things like "Use this one, instead of that" or "I like the red, it makes her eyes pop". I go to sushi bars to meet my besties for lunch and we compare how awesome and interesting our lives are. I read magazines like Vogue and actually care about what's in them. I then write all of this stuff down in a blog and have 10,000 followers who envy me.

Real world Casey wakes up at 7:25 AM when her husband's (who is devilishly handsome, by the way) alarm goes off. After laying in a warm, soft bed for 15 minutes, my ears tuned to the hallway at the end of which is my son's room. Then I hear the clink of toys and the sipping of a sippy and I wait to hear the inevitable "Mommy?". It's the sweetest sound. Sometimes it's annoying because I am tired and want to sleep until 10 like I trained my body to do my whole life. I still can't get over the look on my childs face every morning when he sees me emerge from my bedroom and into his view. It's like pure glee. He is happy to see me! Mostly because I change his diaper, turn on movies, and give him food and juice. But he loves me for it and repays me with kisses and hugs and nosies and bonks (Bonks are our own endearing tradition).

After said shows are on and foods are had, I am still zombied out and trying to wake up. Atrion usually wants to play with toys or play-doh or legos. So I try to corral him for a bit somewhere while Cody does his work thang. I work on school, paying bills, and browse the internets for awhile. I play Words with friends. Sometimes I get dressed. Sometimes I go grocery shopping or to the park or to visit my sister. Sometimes I get donuts or cupcakes. Mostly, I hang out and do whatever. Our house is almost always clean-ish. There is usually laundry to put away and dishes to wash and crumbs to vacuum but nothing too embarrassing. I get to kiss on my husband give him hugs all day long when he isn't dealing with tenants or maintenance emergencies. He gets to play with Atrion lots and lots throughout the day while I work on tidbits of things.
Atrion usually takes a nap between noon and two. Lately he hasn't. I usually nap while he does because I might be anemic or something and have to get 12 hours of sleep a day.
Four o'clock is an exciting time for us. Daddy is off work! woohoo! Let the party start! He makes dinner or I pick something up. His food is always delicious. Our pact is that if I supply the groceries, he will cook the food. He is luscious, isn't he?

Atrion gets fed, played with, snuggled, read to, prayed with, bathed, brushed, and tucked in usually by 7:00. Now it's our "me" time. Our favorite. I slink over to the couch prop open my laptop while simultaneously turning on the tv. If its Monday I watch the Bachelor, Tuesday is Biggest Loser and Parenthood, Wednesday is a netflix day, Thursday is 30 Rock- Parks and Rec -Grey's Anatomy, Friday is a netflix night. Saturday and Sundays are usually movie night or a reading night. I watch a show while I either play World of Warcraft (my blood elf rogue won't level herself), blog, browse hilarious or crafty sites or do homework. I sometimes get bored of that so I will paint my nails or work on a project. Lately my blog is my project and my stomach hasn't been feeling good, so doing nothing feels great. Also, I play a lot of words with friends. I am not very good at it, but it's fun to get beaten by 100 points or so. Also, everyone else cheats so, there's that.

We are in bed by 10 and usually asleep by 11 because we sometimes get the giggles and chat it up about important things like Star Trek and the fact that Atrion laughs everytime he farts now.

Point of this blog: I choo-choo choose my life. Right here. Right now. Even in crappy Memphis (more on this later, I promise).

Adhesiveness; ability of two objects to stick to each other

2012-01-21T18:36:00.004-07:00

Moms are notorious for feeling guilty. If they work away from home, they feel guilty about not spending time with their kids. If they stay at home, they worry they aren't doing enough "quality" activities with their kids. If they work part time then it's just a roller coaster between the two types of guilt. Currently, I stay at home with Atrion. Although, the term "stay at home" is incredibly false since we are out and about all the time. I try to do stuff with Atrion that gets him out of the house. We don't know anyone with kids Atrion's age that want to do stuff with us. Maybe we smell. I don't know. It's usually just me and him, or me and him and Cody. He seems content, so I should probably stop worrying that he is not going to know how to interact with kids his own age. He is absolutely, unequivocally the sweetest child alive. Snuggles and kisses from Atrion are pure bliss. Can someone tell me how to get him to stop growing up? I am going to miss those snuggles and kisses when he decides he is too cool for his mama. In the meantime, I will continue to be his best friend and do stuff like we did these last two weeks.

Shelby Farms is great. It's a great, big park with lots of wide open grassy fields, lakes, nature trails, and picnic areas. There is a kids play area that is pretty amazing. It's free and a little bit of a drive, but their aren't near enough clean parks in Memphis, so we go about once a week. They have 4 areas that kids can play in. There is a sand pit, a huge tube slide, 4 slides built into a pit that was made out of recycled sneakers, swings, and a climbing net thing. Atrion loves the slides. He swings for a bit, but the slides are his favorite. The good thing is that he doesn't have to climb up high because they are built in to the ground so I am not afraid of him falling.

Me and my boy. I look tired.

Atrion insisted on putting his shoe on himself. I think he did a pretty great job. :)

The Children's Museum of Memphis is good for a rainy or super cold day. It was too cold to go to Shelby Farms a week or two ago, so I paid the monies to get in to the museum. Atrion had fun. He loved the little grocery store where he could pick out what to buy. He loves vegetables (not to eat, but to play with) because of Veggietales so he spent most of his time in the produce section. He also loved the big fish hanging from the ceiling and the big airplane.

I let him pick out a toy from the gift shop and he picked out this dinosaur gripper guy. He walked around for days with it doing a really hilarious roar. I wish I could imitate it through text, but it can't be done. It was sort of like a "hawkccht". But very gravelly. I love it.

If there was one activity Atrion would do all day, every day it would be to play with play doh. He says it "May-oh". He can say "play" and he can say "dough", but he can't say play-doh.

My masterpieces.

Atrion loves to read too. This book is one illustrated by Greg Olsen, "I Am Special". Atrion loves it.

Today, we took Atrion to the movies for the very first time. We saw Beauty and the Beast. There was a 6 minute short from Tangled at the beginning that was hilarious! Totally worth the trip. Atrion got a little kids pack with popcorn, soda, and teddy grahams and he made it through the whole thing! He sat on Cody's lap most of the movie because the chair kept folding him up in it. It was cute. He almost didn't make it through, but I pulled out a sucker for the last 15 minutes and he was good to go.

After the movie, we stopped by Muddy's Bakery and got some cupcakes. Two grasshopper, one "Pucker up" which is lemon flavored, and one neopolitan. They were yummy!

I love my son more than anything in this entire world. I love my husband for being such an amazing dad to him (and he's also pretty amazing to me too). These two people are my entire life. I am thankful we are together for eternity. There is nothing in life or death that can tear us apart. Our bond is forever. How amazing is that?

Frank

2012-01-17T19:08:00.003-07:00

There was a whole week and a half where I felt really good. My energy was up, I felt more loving towards Atrion and Cody, my anxiety levels were down, and I had no physical pain.
Let me back up here. I have mentioned my anxiety in a couple previous posts, but it's probably really vague to those of you who are not my husband or my sister who know everything about me. My anxiety started out as a symptom of another persistent problem that is more embarrassing to talk about. IRRITABLE BOWEL SYNDROME!!!!!! Dun-dun-dun. There I said it. My bowels are irritable. Just like me. But seriously, it sucks. IBS is usually diagnosed by eliminating more terrible diseases like Crohn's disease or inflammations like diverticulitis. It's characterized by stomach pain and cramps, accompanied by either constipation or diarrhea, that are relieved only by having a bowel movement. I know...it's gross to talk about. Bear with me, though. I don't know when I will have a flare. I had no problems at all when I was pregnant with Atrion, but a week after I had him, I had a flare up. The cramps were comparable to labor pains. Since I have no idea when or why a spasm will occur, it makes it hard to want to be in a situation where I can't leave easily. This is common with people who suffer from IBS. They start to get anxiety about social situations, but it isn't social anxiety disorder. It's more of a general anxiety about social situations. Some examples that caused me anxiety are: being in a car with people whom I would feel embarrassed if I had to ask to pull over, speaking in church (not because the fear of speaking...I am actually pretty good at speeches, but because I can't just leave the stand unnoticed), and being at other people's houses or any place where there is only one bathroom and it is occupied.
I understand the hilarity of these issues. My sister and I laugh about it all the time, because it's silly. Why would I have this anxiety over these silly bathroom related issues. But its real. And, as a fact, 1 in 5 Americans suffer from it. You wouldn't know it though because who wants to talk about it?
Okay, so I got prescribed Paxil to help with my anxiety. Since anxiety can cause IBS flare ups, that was an important step. I was on it for a year and it helped a lot. Although it does have side effects. I mostly was sleepy after the initial euphoric effects wore off. What I wasn't aware of, was the effects of withdrawals from coming off the medication. There are studies that show that Paxil might be horrible to take when you are pregnant and Cody and I were trying again so I decided to go off of it with the Doctor's consent. She said I could stay on it at a lower dose if I wanted to, but I went off of it completely. The side effects were masked a bit by the morning sickness and tiredness and crankiness. However, once I entered the hospital for my emergency d and c, the anxiety came raging back in. only now it was coupled with a traumatic event.

I decided to go back on Paxil two weeks ago to help with my depression. I was in a dark place emotionally and spiritually. Not just for myself. I have friends and family who are going through such rough things that I wondered at the reason for it all. What is the point of this suffering? I hadn't suffered nearly as much as some others but I was hurting a lot. During the day, I took care of my son and felt okay, but once he was in bed and it was just me and Cody it sort of fell apart. Luckily Cody is my rock. He is amazing. He helped as much as he could. My hormones are still working themselves out to this day. The Paxil immediately relieved my depression. I didn't feel so dark. I sort of felt like I cheated by taking medication for some reason, but it helped so I am not going to complain.

I started losing weight, the healthy way, and we sold our trailer and bought a car. I started feeling the pieces were falling into place. Then, on Sunday night, after I raved about my wonderful weekend (which it was), I started having horrible IBS pains. Usually they last about an hour or two and then go away. This time, they lasted for almost 13 hours. I would get about an hour break in between so it went on for 24 hours straight. There were a lot of factors as to why this happened (hormones, side effects of medication, stress). The crappy (pun intended) thing is that during the most painful time, I had a panic attack. Not a small one. I started thinking that I might have to go to the hospital because the pain was so bad and that triggered my anxiety from the last time I was at the hospital and it all spiraled down from there. I didn't know what was happening to me. I got a light headed, detached feeling, started sweating profusely, hot flashes and pin prickles all over my skin, and feeling like I was going to pass out. I thought I was actually going to die. Full blown panic attack. Since I had such a horrid experience at the hospital, it has given me a fear of that particular place. I don't feel that way about any other hospital. Just that one.

Anyway...I got my anxiety under control through prayer, will-power and deep breathing. I was confused why it had happened so in between spasms, I looked it up. Turns out Paxil, my anti-anxiety medication, can cause anxiety. I don't know for sure if this was the cause or I was just really out of whack, but that is one explanation. I ended up having three more attacks on a smaller scale (I knew what it was and how to control it) since then. These attacks caused me to spiral down into a funk again. Not only was I not feeling well physically, but my emotional and spiritual state was out of whack again. Feeling sheer panic means I am not feeling the comfort of the spirit. It has been an exhausting battle the last two days.

I have explained all of this, not because I enjoy talking about it, but because it will help you understand the profound effect another event had on me.
Today, I got in my new car to make a very quick trip to Walgreens for gatorade and saltines. I grabbed my umbrella since it was raining and stopped at the red box for a peek at the movies. I didn't notice the skinny black guy huddled next to it talking with another lady. I just assumed they were together and had just returned movies. I decided against a movie and started to head indoors when the man stopped me. He was talking very fast and with a thick accent. He was missing most of his teeth and was probably a little drunk. I couldn't understand a word. He was holding poster board and had sketched a woman on it and was pointing at it. Then he stopped talking and looked at me expectantly. I looked back and forth at him and the poster and asked:
"What do you need?"
"I'm hungry." It was a response I understood very clearly. He continued by saying that he was homeless and hadn't eaten in a while. He just needed some money to buy some food.
I told him I didn't have any cash on me (which is true, by the way), and asked if I could instead buy him some food from inside the store. He heartily agreed and we walked into Walgreen's. He was worried about the prices because Walgreen's is marked up higher, but I told him to get whatever he wanted and not to worry. He picked out a loaf of bread, two frozen pizzas (which he said he would heat up in a microwave at a gas station), a bag of chips and a 12 pack of sunkist. Part of me wanted to pick out healthier choices for him, but this was his shopping spree. Not mine.

We checked out and while the woman was bagging his groceries he looked at me and said "You are beautiful." It wasn't in a creepy way, it was more like he was saying I was a beautiful person inside. He also told me over and over again that he loved me and that he had my back if I ever needed him. He also insisted I give him a hug. I wish I would have hugged him more than I did. As I got into my car he took up his position by the redbox machine with his bag of groceries and I could hear the words to the hymn "Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief" blaring in my head as only hymns can blare without being annoying. I could see him waving to me the whole time as I drove out of sight. He was really like a little boy, only 50 years older.

That experience, more than anything else that has happened in the past year has taught me so much. I need to get out of my own head. Stop being stuck on my own problems and help others out when the opportunity presents itself. I was a woman who was alone and I could have easily said "Sorry. No" and went my way thinking of the valid excuses to soothe my conscience. We are all in this world and there is pain and suffering and no one will get by unscathed. However, we can lessen the burdens of others and help them on their way. I know that his name is Frank, and he is always at Walgreen's in the afternoon. I think some missionaries will be stopping to talk to him soon. I don't want to have fear and panic overtake my life. I want the everlasting love of Christ to heal me and make me whole. Even if I am physically weak, I can be spiritually strong no matter what happens. I am striving for this and will continually do so. Thank you Frank for helping me when I needed it most.

A poor wayfaring Man of grief
Hath often crossed me on my way,
Who sued so humbly for relief
That I could never answer nay.
I had not power to ask his name,
Whereto he went, or whence he came;
Yet there was something in his eye
That won my love; I knew not why

On the Cusp of Something Amazing...

2012-01-11T10:51:00.002-07:00

I've been trying to figure out what to blog about so that I don't break my resolutions. I have had some fun times with Atrion and I love him to death, but I post those pictures on facebook and talk about him there and I get bored doing the same thing twice. Maybe I am horrible mother. Why don't I like to blog about my child? Oh well. We play with play-doh and legos so I think he's probably happier I do that instead of talking about doing it. I want this blog to continue to be therapeutic for me. I had a breakthrough with my post about my miscarriage and it felt amazing to get it all out there. I want to keep that feeling. If my blog isn't riddled with pictures it probably isn't fun for anyone to read, but at least I feel good. I probably will blog about Atrion, but I don't want to feel like I have to.

I feel good. I don't have headaches anymore. I have more energy. It's amazing how we take little things for granted. But now I want to utilize my new found energy and do something creative. I have been tossing around some story ideas. I have a few books on how to crochet and make cute stuff. I have a sewing machine and lots of materials I could make something with. None of it seems sufficient enough. I need to do something else. But I don't know what. I am on a quest to figure it out. I think the closest I came to satiating this need was at the beginning of the year, when I first move to Mississippi and I had my Etsy shop. People buying my items and favoriting them and putting them in treasury lists felt so good. And stressful. Stressful because I wasn't making money to cover the costs. I couldn't figure out the shipping prices.

My baby project since then has been the trailer. Getting rid of the roaches, making it livable and finding tenants for it took every ounce of brain power I had left over at the end of the day. Now it's sold, and at a good price. Enough so that when we get back to Idaho I can start another trailer project.

Now, I have free brain space and free time and I don't know what to fill it with. What do other people do? What are some of their hobbies? I asked myself these questions and turned to pinterest and craftgawker where I immediately felt inferior, but motivated. I mean, my hobbies right now are trying to keep up with Meredith Grey, Leslie Knope, and Liz Lemon as well as reading a book or two a week. I am obviously bored.

Here are some of my ideas:

1-start back up with photography and get better at it. Maybe cut back on the retro pics a bit. hehe. I just love the look of the 60's pictures. This would also entail learning more about Adobe Photoshop instead of relying on Picnik or Microsoft picture editor.

2-Write. Start doing prompts again and maybe write a short story. And submit something to somewhere. I would love a rejection letter to put in my Smashbook. I could also use the Scrivener writing tool, which is awesome. Find it at literatureandlatter.com/scrivener.

3-Start a weight loss/ nutrition blog where I devote a portion of my blogging time to researching fads and trends of the diet community as well as learn more about good foods and how they help the body. I don't know who would read this, but I might learn something. I could also do Biggest loser like competitions and do give aways...I dunno.

4-Do something like Gwyneth Paltrow's GOOP website.

5-Find a cause and promote it. An example would be the incredibly loud train that comes by and honks for 5 minutes at 3 in the morning. Not necessary Conductor Fred.

And I am out of ideas. I love suggestions, though so please comment and tell me what you do for your hobby. You can also vote for which hobby I should take up. Choose from the 5 here or submit your own.

Casey's 2011 Favorites

2012-01-05T18:41:00.006-07:00

Here are some of my old and new favorites for the year 2011.

Of course, first up is my Kindle because it is awesome. I love to read and amazon has cheap books I can download with the press of a button. Plus the screen doesn't give me headaches like my ipod or laptop. It's just like reading a regular book. It's getting pretty old compared to the new kindles they have out now, but it's still rockin' it.

There are two TV shows that have really gripped me this year. The first is The Walking Dead because I am semi obsessed with zombies. It's pretty gory for a TV show and I jump out of my skin at some parts, but that's one reason why I like it. Cody likes it too, which is rare because he never watches TV.

The second tv show is Parks and Rec. I LOVE this show. The first season is funny, but not laugh out loud funny. Once they got rid of the stupid guy and brought in Rob Lowe, and gave Andy more lines, it all fell into place. I love every single character. I watched all the seasons on netflix. It got me laughing the past few weeks and made me feel better after everything that has happened. Soft spot for Parks and Rec always.

This little beauty is a Mother's planner from peterpauper.com. It's an 18 month planner, and I got the cutest style with butterflies and flowers. It's thick and has a wide monthly planner at the beginning of each month and then daily pages after that for more detailed schedules. It also has notes sections and all the other good stuff you need with a planner. My only regret is that I need to use it more.

Another goodie from peterpauper.com. The are bookmarks, but they are magnetic so you clip it onto the page you want to mark. I got cupcakes. I love them.

Laura posted this on her favorites and I am going to copy her. I bought the nail polish a few days after her and I love it!! It's the glittery goodness I have been looking for for years. Maybe even decades...

This is another shout out to Zombies. I love this book. It's the first of a forthcoming trilogy. It isn't an outright "zombie" book, but it starts off with a girl hiking in the woods to get some peace and clarity on her life. She is 17 and has a brain tumor that is malignant and she is most likely going to die. While she is deep in the woods and high on the mountains, something similar to an EMP is emitted and everything changes from there. It is surprising and has many different levels. Love it. You should read it.

I love my smashbook! I have so many little things I don't have time to scrap book, but I don't want to lose. So, this is perfect. It comes with a glue stick and pen in one. There are different types for what you want. I just got the one for scrapbooking. There's also some with graph paper for things like interior design, or architecture. It's neat and I love to see the finished pages which take all of 5 minutes.

I love telling everyone about my favorites and I love to hear about everyone else's too.

Begin Again

2012-01-03T19:00:00.002-07:00

It is time for my resolutions. I want to have the best year that I can possibly have in 2012. 2011 has taught me that there are things I have no control over, but there are things that I do but choose not to.
After Atrion was born, I never lost the extra weight I gained from my pregnancy. I'm staying steady at 157 pounds and that is 32 pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight and 37 pounds over my pre-marriage weight. I have my excuses for this and here they are for all the world to see:
~I have no energy.
~I have no time.
~I need more relaxing time to keep my stress down (relaxing being watching TV, reading, or other sedentary activities).
~I get too bored doing repetitive activities like running or exercise videos.
~Can't afford the expense of a gym membership.
~Healthy food is more expensive, doesn't last long, and is harder to make taste good.
~Let's face it, it's quicker to take something out of the freezer and pop it in the oven
Now. I learned from a wise employer to never make an excuse or take an excuse from anybody. My life is in my control and making an excuse is putting the control onto someone/something else.
Here are my excuse busters:
~I will have more energy if I am healthier and don't weigh myself down with icky foods. Exercise is proven to help boost energy.
~I have as much time in a day as everyone else. Making 20 minutes to work out should not be as difficult as I think it is in my mind. The laundry and dishes can wait.
~I can have relaxing time after I work out. Exercise has also proven to be a stress buster.
~I would rather be bored for twenty minutes a day than fat everyday.
~I don't need to go to a gym. I already spent all that money on P90X and Jillian Michaels DVDs. Taking walks and chasing Atrion is great exercise too.
~Healthy food doesn't have to be so hard. How about stop eating junk like candy, soda and chips for the first bit and then work on meals. Baby Steps.
~Any meal tastes better when more effort is put in. Make pre-made meals from scratch and freeze those for ease of use later.

Okay so there's my first goal. Lose 30 pounds this year. My game plan: Work out 5 days a week for at least 20 minutes, drop soda and sugary drinks, limit snacking, smaller meal portions, don't get discouraged. Bam. I'll keep you posted on that.

My next goal is to blog more. I can combine this with my first one and blog about my fitness updates, as well as posting more fun things and journal entries. Should be nice. I am aiming for one blog a week at least.

These are my two big resolutions and I hope to stay motivated with them throughout the year...and beyond.
Any suggestions ya'll have would be great.

BEST OF: 2011 MOMENTS

2012-01-02T15:47:00.011-07:00

It's already the 2nd of January! Woohoo! Happy New Year! I could end 2011 by saying it was the crappiest year of my entire life and I am glad to see it go....but I won't. I think there were some pretty darn good things that happened and I am excited to share them. Here it is ladies and gents...but mostly ladies probably, my Best of: 2011.

Took a trip to see Laura, Josh, and Carter and Nate was able to come too.

It was a lot of fun because I have never been on any vacation with my brother. We ate some awesome food and celebrated his birthday.

So moving across the country was a great experience, but it can also be on the bad side of my list. However, the feeling of getting out on our own and not knowing what to expect was very exhilarating and self-assuring. We now know we can live anywhere and be okay. Yeah, it's hard, but we can do it. That's a great feeling to have.

One of the funnest times I had while here was with my sister. We went to a charity event that was very expensive to get into, but had an "all you can eat" crawfish boil, soda, and some BBQ things like wings and sausage. There was a silent auction and a few door prizes that we didn't win. Oh yeah, they also had great cheesecake. Mmmm....

Memphis has some pretty great attractions. One of the best is the zoo. I have been there twice and both times was exceptional. I thought it was funny though that when we went as a family they had a Rocky Mountain exhibit complete with pine trees, bears and wolves. I guess those don't seem very exotic to an Idaho girl. It was great though. Atrion had a blast.

Cody is a BBQ fanatic, so moving to the BBQ capital of the world was a great selling point. This is one of my most favorite dates with him because of his boy-like glee upon getting his platter.

Buying our second trailer was a great experience. It is, after all, the whole reason for us moving us here. Now we are in negotiations to sell it at a gain so that's awesome. Here is a picture of our wonderful trailer:

Atrion's birthday, Easter, Christmas, Thanksgiving, and other momentous occasions were all amazing, but I think the one holiday that stands out as our family favorite this past year is Halloween. It was just awesome. Josh decorated his van and we went around to idyllic neighborhoods where lots and lots of kids were trick or treating. The weather was nice and Atrion got lots of candy. He was a tiger and everyone loved him.

Okay 2012....Beat that.

It's all a little weird.

2012-01-01T12:33:00.002-07:00

I haven't blogged since September!? What?! That's far too long. And too much has happened. How can I possibly catch up? I had a birthday, we moved again, Cody got a new job, I got a new job, there was Halloween, Thanksgiving, Cody's birthday and Christmas. There was the pregnancy excitement and then sadness. There was stress about doctors visits, medicaid, and then the emergency room visit. There was family illness and friend illness. Now, it's New Year's Day and we are planning to sell our investments, buy a car, and move back to Idaho once Cody has secured a job. All since little ol' September. It's a little much, and I might be a tad insane. Did I mention that since then that Atrion has pooped on his floor 10 times? That's 10 times too many, if you ask me.
I think I want to write about the worst thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life in this post and then catch up with the good stuff at a later date.
Since Atrion turned one, Cody and I have discussed occasionally when we wanted to have another baby. Finally, when Atrion turned two, we both agreed that it would be a wonderful time to add a new member to our family. I started my job at a new chiropractor's office and we moved to Memphis a month later. I was feeling sick, tired, and nothing sounded good to eat. A week later I ate almost a whole gallon jar of dill pickles over a few days. Pregnant! The stick confirmed it. We were very excited. We couldn't even wait for too long to tell anyone. I was 6 weeks along when we told everyone. Which is too early. I knew this. But I was excited.
I had been doing everything I was supposed to. Before I was pregnant, I had a pre-pregnancy exam and starting tapering off my anxiety medication. I was taking prenatal vitamins and going on nice walks with Atrion. I felt good. Stressed about work and money and our trailers, but still good.
Then the morning sickness hit and I quit my job to relieve some of the stress and be with Atrion more. I was tired all the time. Very similar to my first pregnancy, but I didn't have a two year old demanding my time back then and I could sleep all day if I wanted to. I was grumpy and hormonal. I would jump from being extremely angry to bawling my eyes out and then feel guilty for doing both of those things in a matter of minutes. It's hard being a woman. It's probably also hard being married to a woman and having a woman as a mother. Namely, Me. But Cody and Atrion still seem to love me, so I guess I might not have been too bad.
We thought that Cody's new job would provide us with fabulous benefits, but they cut the insurance benefits down so low when he started that it wasn't worth the price because the deductible was so high and the benefits were not good. Darn. So close. Oh well. I decided to try the Tennessee medicaid which is called Tenncare, also known as "It sucks and no one accepts it anywhere". For three weeks I tried calling around to providers to see if they accepted Tenncare so that when I was approved for it, I wouldn't have to switch doctors. All of the places I knew to call did not accept it. I asked why and they said because Tenncare doesn't pay for anything. Basically the doctors don't want to give away their services and waste time when they could have other well-paying patients instead. Understandable. Stupid Tenncare. It took me 3 weeks to find a place that I could go to. I was completely stressed about this because I felt something was off. I needed to be seen. My morning sickness had disappeared. I was feeling a little more energetic. The spice cupboard didn't make me gag. Wasn't there a place that could just let me listen to my baby's heart beat? I was 10 weeks along and found some numbers for some clinics. The first one I called said it would be $100.00 for a urine test and they could see me in 4 weeks. I said "But I'm 10 weeks pregnant." She said "Do you want the appointment or not?". I took the appointment, hung up the phone, and started crying. Then, I went online and found the same website I used in my first pregnancy and ordered a Babybeat doppler recorder that would let me hear my baby's heart beat. If no one was going to help me, then I would do it myself. It would take two days to get there. After I placed the order, I was browsing the TN welfare website so that I could find someone to call and yell at when I came across a small link that led me to a page about clinics in the area that could help me. I finally found a clinic that does a sliding scale fee and I would only have to pay $25.00 a visit. About the same as a copay for insurance would be. Nice. And they could see me that evening. I honestly expected a dung hole of a place filled to the brim with sick, coughing, vomiting people. That's the price you have to pay for cheap care right? Luckily though, it was a beautiful office with nice receptionists (I had gotten my fill of rotten, cranky receptionists at this point), and not very many people waiting. I was there after business hours and so really no one was there. Just a receptionist, a nurse, and a doctor. Turns out he wasn't an experienced OBGYN, but was just a regular practitioner. He confirmed our pregnancy, but didn't want to do an exam. Instead he just got out the doppler. This was all fine by me. That's all I wanted. Let's hear this baby. Only he couldn't find the heartbeat. I was somehow prepared for that. He assured us that it was most likely his fault and that we should come back in the morning to have the actual OBGYN do the doppler. I was disappointed to have to prolong this experience, but I didn't cry. I knew something was wrong, but Cody had given me a blessing earlier that comforted me saying we would raise this baby and that it would be healthy and strong. I was confused. On the drive home, I started thinking about the maternity clothes I had just bought a few days earlier. I wondered aloud if I should return them. Cody looked at me and took my hand and said he thought everything was fine. We would go back in the morning and the doctor would find the baby's heart beat and we could stop stressing. I felt bad being negative because what if he was right? It was very surreal going home and having a regular evening (although Atrion was staying the night at cousin Carter's so it wasn't too regular). We had hamburgers and fries from Backyard Burgers...which is ridiculously overpriced, by the way. We watched a show or two. I read a bit. Cody played games. Then we went to bed. The next morning, we were up and at our appointment bright and early. I was very anxious and there was a lot of people waiting. They had squeezed us in so we had to wait longer. A woman was vomiting in the waiting room, this time. Suddenly it wasn't a very nice office anymore. After an hour and a half wait, we were called back to the exam room. We waited another twenty minutes and could hear the doctor in the room next to ours talking so maddeningly slow that is made me want to bash my head in the wall. Just let me hear my baby, people!!! Hurry the crap up!
At the point where I as going to jab a tongue depressor in my eye, the doctor finally came in. I think his last name was McAllister. That's probably wrong. I also have blocked out his face for some reason. I know he was skinny and around 50 years old. He also had a female assistant with him. He was very nice. But he still talked too slow and too much. I laid on the table as he assured me that sometimes you cannot detect a heartbeat until 12 weeks with the Doppler, but if he couldn't then he would perform and ultrasound. This was the best news. Well, he couldn't find a heartbeat with a Doppler, so they stepped out of the room while I got undressed. They came back in too quickly, but whatever since they were about to see a whole lot more of me. This time, they brought in another lady to help with the machine. Three strangers all staring at my lady parts. I didn't even care.
The doctor invited Cody back around to look at the monitor with him so he could see the baby. Right away, I heard the doctor say "There's baby". Then he moved the wand around and listed off other parts like my bladder and blah blah blah. Then he went back and said "Okay there's baby. I'm sorry, but there is no heart beat." I was extremely prepared for this. I had known it, right? I had felt that something was off. But no amount of preparation could ever make those words hurt less. I started sobbing immediately. The assistant and the nurse in the room both came over and hugged me and tried to comfort me as the doctor still probed to try and find when baby died. They were both crying. Cody had to lie on the floor because he felt light headed. I couldn't stop crying. Finally after what seemed like ages, the doctor was done with his measurements and probing. The baby was 9 weeks. It's little heart most likely stopped beating. There was nothing that could be done, and it was nobody's fault. I was allowed a minute to get dressed. They stepped out of the room and my sobbing turned into wailing as I clung to my husband. When they came back in, I was blindly putting my shoes on. The doctor talked for what seemed like hours, as I tried to hold back my tears. All I wanted to do was get out of there so I could grieve. He talked about how the cervix was closed and everything in tact, so it was technically called a missed abortion. The baby died, but my body hadn't yet decided to fully miscarry. He said I had three options: wait and see if my body does it naturally, he would give me two weeks; take pills that speed up the process; or have a d and c. The first one sounded the best to me in that moment. I needed time anyway to think about all of this. Yet, he talked on and on. I don't remember what he said after that. We were led out of the room, but instead of checking out we had to have my blood drawn because I couldn't remember my blood type. I had regained control over my crying mostly, but once we sat down to wait for the lab tech, I started up again. It went like that until we got to the car where I just broke down and cried a lot. The only thing I wanted in that moment was to have Atrion with me so I could hug him and snuggle him. Unfortunately he was 40 minutes away and our car wouldn't start. That seemed odd to me. I just wanted to leave this stupid place. With some persistence and a little swearing, Cody got it started. We drove to get Atrion when it was learned that he couldn't be brought to us. He has no idea why I was crying and hugging him so tight, but he hugged me back and let me hold him. He even patted my back and my hair and gave me a kiss.
**Warning: The Next Part is slightly Graphic**
That was on a Tuesday. By Thursday morning, I had come to accept that my baby that was growing inside me had died and that I should try and move on. I scheduled the D&C for the next morning on Friday. We made arrangements to have Atrion sleep over again at his cousins house. It was about 8:30 pm on Thursday night when I was pondering how I didn't want to be sedated but couldn't imagine not knowing when the miscarriage would happen naturally. I could wait for months, from what I read. That's when my body decided it was time. I felt a small "pop" and a gush. I got in the shower and stayed there for an hour and half because it was too much blood. Huge clots and lots of blood. I was terrified of seeing the little body. At about ten, I was still bleeding without any stop to the flow and was getting light headed. Cody called the hospital to let the nurses know we were coming. They said to just go to the ER and they would be there with a room waiting for us. So we went there, and the front desk girl just looked at us with a very irritated look and told us to fill out paperwork. I scoffed and said I was having a miscarriage and needed to be seen right away. She wrote down a little bit of our information and then disappeared through a door without saying anything. I was leaning on Cody and the front desk. My pants were soaked through with blood and it was still coming. The girl returned with a cup and said she needed a urine sample. I not so quietly refused by yelling "I am BLEEDING! A LOT!". Since she couldn't see my pants from behind the desk, I guess I don't blame her too much, but we had called ahead and they said there shouldn't be any problems. The girls told me to sit down and wait for the nurse. I moved to the side of the desk and stayed leaning against it. I didn't think she really would want me to sit and bleed all over the chairs. Cody ran to park the car in a non emergency zone at my request. He had left the car running too. So I figured it might be better to move it and lock it so that we would have a way to get home. I love him. He never wanted to leave my side. That's when large black nurse #1 came up behind me. She said "Oh girl! You soiled yourself!". I blinked at her a few times and said "I'm bleeding...possibly to death". She said, " I know, that's what I said". After that she only mumbled a bit. Cody made it back just in time for nurse #1 to take me to the back. They said he couldn't come. I was pissed, but they wouldn't budge. He had to sit in the emergency room with the crackheads and meth addicts wanting free drugs. They took my weight and blood pressure and were awed by how low it was. Ya think!! I am still mad at them. Anyways, they rolled me out in a wheelchair to take me to the triage room which was also filled with drug addicts. They parked me in what I thought was the middle of a hallway facing an obese black man also in a wheel chair, except he was facing the TV. His nurse might have been more considerate. I had no idea what was going on. The nurse didn't even talk to me for 5 minutes. I was writhing from the cramps and still bleeding everywhere. They didn't even give me a blanket. Finally, they wheeled me into the curtained off bed space. I had to take off all my clothes behind curtains that weren't properly closed. I didn't care enough to close them all the way. If they had let Cody come with me, he would have made sure they were closed. I put my soaked clothes in a bag the nurse held for me and tried to put on the gown. I was laying on the bed that had no pillow. I was all by myself, except for the 50 or so people squirming all around me in their beds and curtains as well the doctors (maybe there was just one), and nurses. Finally, a cranky white nurse came in smelling like a cigarette break and I asked her if they could get Cody for me. She said "No. We haven't got you all set up yet." And she tied a band around my arm for the IV. I was going to tell her that no one gets an IV in that arm and she should use the other one, but it was too late. She had already stuck my arm and was swearing like a sailor about the vein that suddenly disappeared. Then she tried my hand. That hurt worse than the cramping. She couldn't get it in there either. So she left. I honestly didn't think she was coming back. But she did. And she stuck me in the other arm and got it in just fine. She seemed like she was sort of freaking out, which made me freak out a little bit. Then Cody showed up and I cried for joy. A few minutes later, the doctor showed up all smiley and trying to crack jokes. He wheeled me to what I thought was a closet, but turned out to be a dusty exam room. (You never want the place where you have your most intimate body parts examined to be described as 'dusty'). They called an OBGYN Resident down to help clean out some blood clots and see why I was bleeding so much. It took about an hour for that. The resident was nice. He said that there was still a lot of tissue in my uterus and that it had blocked the cervix. My body was responding by trying to force it out with more blood. I had incredibly low blood pressure but not low enough to be too worried just yet. He gave me the three options again, but tried to push me towards taking pills that would open my cervix up more. I said no. I didn't want anymore painful cramps. I was already scheduled for a D&C anyway the next day so I would prefer the surgery. The bleeding had slowed a lot from the resident unblocking my cervix. I felt light headed and anxious still. Also, there were still no pillows for my head so I was very uncomfortable. They wheel me to the labor and delivery section and all the ER nurses realized I didn't have a bracelet or any paperwork done. Efficient. I guess I didn't even have a chart. Oh well. If the ER was hell, the labor and delivery was at least the terrestrial kingdom. It was quieter and the nurses were happier. I got a more private room. The woman Cody talked to on the phone was there and said she was waiting for us for the past three hours. We then learned that there were two emergency rooms and we went to the wrong one. Darn it. We waited for about 2-3 hours because I was stable and there was an emergency C-section that needed attended to. When the anesthesiologist was available (an awesome Korean woman with a thick accent and caterpillar eyebrows, I liked her instantly) they started prepping me with the usual IV fluids and medicines. I started freaking out. Remember, I was off my anxiety medication. That hurried them along. I remember being wheeled away from Cody who had to wait somewhere else again. They went into the wrong room first. And left me by myself again while they tried to find the right room. I was shivering with anxiety, sadness, and fear. Then they came and got me again and wheeled me into the right room. The doctor administered the sedative and I barely remember the other doctors and nurses getting my legs situated for the surgery. I woke up a little bit later thinking it had happened yet, but it was all over. I was in recovery with one nurse. I was covered with warm blankets and it was dark. I felt sleepy and my head was heavy and fuzzy. It went well. Cody was then led in. An hour later I was in paper scrubs, all the IV's out of me, and we were walking to the car. It seems weird to be able to get up and walk out of the hospital after all that. I slept for almost two days. My husband and sister were amazing. I got nice flowers from my mom. Everyone's facebook comments helped ,e feel just a tad better. I think I am doing well now. It was hard for the first week.
The doppler I had ordered came, and I just had to send it right back. I got email updates about the baby's progress that made me cry. I thought about Atrion's little baby clothes and I would cry. I still cry sometimes out of nowhere when a thought hits me.
I think about our excitement just a few weeks ago and I can't help but wonder if the next time will be as pure as that. Deep down will we be fearful of having another miscarriage and so we won't celebrate as much? I hope not.
Right now, I feel weird. I think that the lack of pillows in the hospital really screwed up my neck. I have had headaches for the past two weeks. My follow up visit went well. I am doing just fine...physically. Except for the headaches. Which might be caused by depression and tension. Time will tell.
I love my family. They are the most important thing in my life and I am excited to get back to Idaho to be near most of them. I just need Shy to stay put and Laura to move back as well. :) Make it happen. ;)
Also, if anything good has come out of this I think that my marriage is more solid and stronger because of it. I love him and feel like we can get through anything together.

Photo Challenge: Loved one, Fruit, and Something Blue

2011-09-17T19:48:00.000-06:00

Day 4 Photo Challenge: Something Green

2011-09-11T19:02:00.002-06:00

I didn't want to be all cliche with the grass and the trees, so I took about 50 pictures of some random things around the house. I also wasn't feeling good, so they aren't a stretch.

Photo Challenge Day 3: Clouds

2011-09-10T17:45:00.004-06:00

Edited Clouds

Unedited Clouds

Reflection of clouds in a puddle

Photo Challenge Day 2: What Did I Wear Today?

2011-09-09T20:36:00.003-06:00

I thought this was a weird challenge, but perhaps I just didn't think outside the box very well. Oh well, here is my day 2 photos.

Self Portrait

2011-09-08T17:14:00.003-06:00

Taken with Canon PowerShot A470/ Edited with Microsoft Office Picture Manager.

My New Project.

2011-09-07T21:53:00.001-06:00

Family Fortress

2011-08-05T20:38:00.004-06:00

A Family is a blessing
It means so many things
Words could never tell
The joy a family brings.

A family is a bond of faith
That even time can't sever
A gift to last all of our lives
A family is forever.

My Boy.

2011-07-29T13:47:00.004-06:00

It's been a lovely few days. The weather has been cool, for the most part. That is, in comparison to the garish heat wave we've been stumbling through for awhile. It's been nice enough that I have had motivation to take Atrion outside to play. He loves to wander around and play with the kitties.
Before this pleasant change in the weather, we had to play inside a lot. This means that Atrion was very cranky and wound-up. He managed to get creative with a few of his toys and I think he is hilarious.

Atrion's Prayer

2011-07-24T18:53:00.003-06:00

For family prayer tonight, Cody helped Atrion repeat the words to a prayer. This is how it went:

Cody- Dear Heavenly Father,
Atrion- Dear Bobby,

Cody-Thankful for this day,
Atrion- Bob, bob, bob, bobby

Cody-Thankful for our family
Atrion- Bob, bobby

Cody-Thankful for our friends
Atrion- Larryboy

Cody- Please bless us that we can sleep good
Atrion- (yelling) DUCKY!!

Cody-Please bless our friends and family
Atrion- Bacon! (pronounced beacon)

Cody-Name of Jesus, Amen.
Atrion- Bacon! Amen!

New Haircut and a Sick Day

2011-07-20T19:17:00.002-06:00

After the hair incident yesterday, we attempted to buzz Atrion's hair. He did not like that one bit. To top it off, he is sick. He's got a head cold and you can see in his sweet little eyes that he doesn't feel good. So, his cut was very uneven and patchy, and so we had to do it AGAIN this morning. That really just made him even more mad at us. So, we went to Walmart and got him a little Elmo doll and book to make up for it. That seemed to help a little. Every time he touches his head though, he jerks his hand back as if he was bitten and says "Oh, sorry! Oh, sorry" and looks very sad and worried like he did something wrong. Poor kid. Here are some picks of his new "do".

He has been playing through his naps lately and nothing we do will get him to sleep. Until, that is, we let him out of his room and he snuggles with dad.

This picture is so sad to me. Atrion just looks miserable with his cold, and I look wretched because...well that's just how I look these days. It's too hot for makeup and excessive hair-doing.

The Good, the Bad, and the Hilarious

2011-07-19T17:44:00.002-06:00

This has been an interesting week so far. And it's only Tuesday. I left the crayons in Atrion's diaperbag, and I left the diaperbag in his room. This is what happened:

I think he has true artistic talent. He was very proud of it and I didn't have the heart to be mad at him because of how pleased he was with the outcome.

I am sad that he has managed to break every single pair of glasses I own. At least these were $8.00 Old Navy ones that were over a year old. At least.

Atrion is a tech head. Just like his mom and dad. He loves to watch "Bobby" or "Elmo" on our ipods. This was a sweet moment I wanted to capture. We had all just woken up and Atrion climbed up onto the couch, put the pillow on his lap and just watched Elmo for about 15 minutes. Cody and I were able to eat breakfast in peace and quiet (if you consider Elmo's voice peaceful and quiet...which I don't...so "relative" peace and quiet is a better phrase).

Cody might be mad at me for posting this picture because he hasn't had the opportunity to shower before I snapped this shot. I love it though. It is one of my all-time favorite pictures that I have taken.

Next up, we have exhibit B, the "B" stands for butcher. As in "Carter butchered Atrion's and his hair". Hilarity.

I am not sure why Atrion is so sad. It's as if he knew I was going to post the pictures for all to see.

He has also reached a few milestones. He has gotten weaned off of his bink, and he has shown interest in going "potty". So we will see how long before he is a full-fledged little boy. I just love him to bits and pieces.

The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows.

2011-07-13T20:36:00.003-06:00

Dear Future Me,
You will be turning 27 when you read this. To me, that seems very old. I can't believe I am about to be 26. Where has the time gone?
My biggest worry has always been that when I get older, I will have regrets. I never want to have regrets and that is my biggest driving force in life. Is it still? Probably. I don't see us changing that much in a year. But then again, a year ago we were in a much different place than now. We are in a good place.
My advice...always keep moving. Keep going forward and progressing. You know how much I hate stagnation. It's not good for our emotional health.
Remember when Atrion would come sprinting into the bedroom at the trailer we lived in? He would be so excited that you were going to wake up for the day so he ran pell-mell into the room and jumped on the bed and elbowed and kneed his way into the middle of the bed to snuggle. Then, he would politely ask for "Bobby". Meaning, he wanted to watch Veggietales on your iPod. I know that I get annoyed with him in the moment, but I don't want you to forget that. It's a precious, sweet thing that some people never experience or appreciate.
You know our husband? Yeah, the amazingly awesome, smart, and devastatingly handsome one? I hope you are treating him well. Things are so good now. We both get to stay home with Atrion and work on projects we want to do. He is writing you know. He's a writer. Make sure he is still a writer, for me okay?
Right now, I want to go home. I miss Idaho so bad. I keep thinking about the Fall season and the wonderful smells, feels, and sights that come along with it. Crunching leaves, crisp, cold air, pumpkin pies, cinnamon scents, spooky decorations, excited kids, mittens, jackets, hats, scarves, seeing your breath, little tigers and witches running around, snuggling up and watching a scary movie where it's warm, the sense that Christmas is coming and that wonderful Christmas Spirit that pervades the months of November and December.
I don't know what fall is like here. I here it gets cold, but I am worried it isn't the same. Of course it isn't. I shouldn't care about that, but it makes me home sick. I want to be in Kathy's kitchen with all Cody's family frosting cookies or having a cooking contest. I miss Lynn dozing off in the chair, and Shelby subtley taking all her amzing pictures. I miss Shy. She makes me laugh hysterically and will drop everything to help someone out. I miss Sierra. She's such an amazing friend and sister. She is so kind hearted and will freely give compliments that make you feel special. I loved having them all so close.
I miss my Mom and Dad.I miss being able to drive a few hundred miles and stay with them a couple of days. I loved "vacationing" at their house and having my mom give me a big hug and kiss on the cheek or head and talk to me about everything. I miss my Dad and his cynical sense of humor. The way he works so hard all day. He was always there for my track meets and even helped coach. He would come home and get me and take me to the junior high school to practice throwing. I remember we would throw until the sun would set and we couldn't see any more. I love that. I miss sitting in the living room chatting with everyone until the late hours of the night laughing our heads off. Yes, we were making fun of someone probably, but it brought us closer. I miss Jake and spending time with him. He became an amazing friend to Cody and I. He is hilarious and brilliant. I am so proud of the person he has become. I am glad he made it through his high school experience with just that...a lot of fun experiences. He seems so sure of himself.I was never that in high school.
I miss Nate. My big brother. I pray for him every night and I hope he knows how much I love him. He's got such a big heart and just accepts people for who they are. I miss Halle, and Easton, and Reese, and Kairi. They are amazing. They are beautiful, they are sweet and innocent.
I am glad I am close to Laura and Josh and Carter. Those are three of the most wonderful people in the world. My sister is my best friend. I am too mean to her. I am too grumpy at Carter. I love them both so much, though. I will try and appreciate them more so that in a year from now, you have no regrets. Josh is one of the coolest people I know. I wish I could absorb some of his talent.
Don't forget that you have accomplished a lot since you moved here. It was not a mistake and you are supposed to be here. Its incredibly hard, but it's very much worth it...I hope. Well, you tell me. Was it worth it? I will try hard to make it worth it. After all, it's up to me right?
My hope is that you grow. That you learn from every experience and glean whatever you can from it. My hope is that you love and not forget. Don't ever forget the little, precious moments with Atrion. The way his bink wiggled up and down in his mouth, the way his little toe sticks out all funny. How he laughs until he turns beet red at silly things. His teeth. :)Bonks. Loves. Bobby. Larryboy. Peekabo.
My hope is that you eventually go home. Idaho is the best place, but we will go where we are needed.
In a year, you should have at least 6 trailers if I continue at the rate I am going. That's about $3500.00. You can go home then.
My hope is that you live with no regrets. I will try my best to make that happen.
Love,
Me

Two Years Ago Today

2011-07-13T19:01:00.002-06:00

It's my little Atrion's 2nd birthday today. We had a great day just being together as a family. We went into Memphis to go to an Asian market because I am making lots of Asian cuisines for dinner this week. When I say making, I mean planning the meals and buying the groceries for Cody to cook. :)We ate at a delicious Thai restaurant where the host gave Atrion some free strawberry Pocky. In the picture below he is enjoying a very juicy lime wedge.
I love Atrion so much. He is truly an incredibly person. He is tall, skinny, and has crazy, spiky, multicolored hair that won't lie flat. He loves to snuggle with his soft blankets, and watch Veggietales. He is a very fast learner and adapts to many situations very quickly. He loves to read a lot as well. He also enjoys tearing up books almost as much. He laughs hysterically when we tell "secrets" about Dad and hide under the pillows waiting for him to get out of the shower. He goes crazy for bathtime, hates nap time, is a picky eater, loves candy, and always wants to go bye-bye. Basically he is like any other kid, only he is super sweet and very reserved around people he doesn't know well. He tends to run away from bullies instead of fight back. He is a softie and will cry if you get too harsh with him. Anything that runs off of electricity intrigues him. For the longest time he was obsessed with lamps. Now it's laptops, iPods, and DVD players. He can destroy a house in two seconds flat by messing with a "decoy" item that draws my attention to it, and while I am cleaning that up he is getting into 10 other things. He plays "babies" with his stuffed monkey. He takes Bob and Larry everywhere. He loves to build with blocks but only if either Cody or I play with him. He likes to play with dice, break eye glasses, help unload the dishwasher, load and unload the dryer, roll around on blankets when I am trying to fold them up, and take out all the DVD's and mix them up in their cases.
He is the best snuggler. I love him so much. He is the greatest. He can go ahead and stop growing up now.

Me Time.

2011-07-08T20:45:00.003-06:00

Tonight I am watching my sweet nephew Carter who just fell asleep watching Kung Fu Panda. Cody has his weekly Fridy game night where he gets online with all his Idaho friends and plays games. Atrion goes to bed at about 7. So.....It's MEEEE TIME!!!!!

My Little Suave Shopper

2011-07-08T17:46:00.003-06:00

Atrion will be celebrating his 2nd birthday tomorrow. I can't believe how fast he is growing up. His Grammy and Bompa sent him a $30.00 gift card and so today I took him to buy a couple of presents with it. He chose very wisely too. We wandered up and down the aisles and he tested out a few toys to make sure they were worthy of purchase. The first one that he chose was a carefully considered hot wheels car for a buck. The next toy was a actually a Walle book, which sounds like "why" in Atrion tongue. Then he picked up an Elmo toy, but put that back (aka threw it)when he saw the LeapFrog laptop. Which is interesting because he bypassed the older kid toy and went straight for the 2-4 age group. I might be playing it fast and loose with the word interesting, but I think it's interesting. :)
After that, I stopped in the party aisle to get some balloons and he saw the "Cars" cup for $.88 so that got thrown in the cart as well. In the candy aisle, he wanted to get some juji fruit but I had to step in because those are way too chewy for him. We traded for some jolly rancher gummies instead. His total purchase was $30.33. I was amazed at how close he was able to get to his limit.
By the time we got home he had forgotten about all his goodies in the trunk and so I was able to sneak them inside to be wrapped for his party.

Atrion also got to talk to his Grammy today and was so happy to hear her voice that he tried to hug the fun. He also said he loved her and told her about Bob and Larry Boy for a minute. Thanks so much for the gift, Grammy and Bompa. Atrion and I had a wonderful time picking out his presents.

Hair

2011-07-06T20:59:00.002-06:00

This is the result from my hair experiment with the sock bun. I did this as a dry run over night, and it probably would look better if my hair was a little more moist when I put it up. however, Cody really like it! :)

2011-07-03T14:51:00.004-06:00

This is a link to the Sock Bun tutorial. I tried it today and I LOVE it! I have never been able to pull off a perfect bun (or a messy bun for that matter). Here is the result of my first attempt.

Tonight I am going to try the sock bun curls. These curls look fabulous. I can't wait to see the results.

2011-07-01T10:07:00.002-06:00

Since I moved to the South, I have had WeatherBug constantly updating me on all things weather related. This stems from a deep fear of tornadoes and lightning storms. I used to be embarrassed that I was scared of storms, but it's true. I am scared of storms, bugs, sharks, the dark, and gross drains. Actually, the drains don't even have to be gross, but it is assumed that since it is a drain, it is gross because the stuff that usually goes down drains is unwanted and...gross.
what was I talking about? Oh yeah...weatherbug.
So, the past few days, it has been sunny, hot, and humid. Not even a wisp of wind. This is good for the tornado and storm area, but apparently down here there is something called a "Code Orange Ozone Forecast". This happens when it is hot, sunny, and no wind. It causes the pollution to heat up (from the Memphis area I presume) and makes "bad" ozone so we are warned to not go outside, especially if we have small children who might be prone to asthma. We also are warned from doing anything involving outdoors activities such as driving too much in the heat without proper air filtration, painting (since the fumes add to the ozone), and any exercise or exertion activities. The side effects can cause a sore throat and irritated lungs. By the way, I woke up with a sore throat.

So basically, the reason I am writing this is because I was planning on driving to the trailer and finishing up the painting but that is out of the question. The other reason is because I wanted to ask WHY DO PEOPLE LIVE HERE?

Cody Woot!Woot! Wootton

2011-06-30T19:22:00.009-06:00

A lot of people may not know how awesome my husband is. He is great. We have had some amazing times together and I can think of no other person in the world that I would rather spend eternity with. So, you might not ever be able to get to know him like I do, but at least you have this interview that I did about him. Here you go:

Please state your full name: Cody Lynn Wootton
Favorite Food?: *smacks lips* Mmm Pho and BBQ

Favorite Activity?: Playing games.
Can you be more specific?: Umm...No.

Favorite Movie?: There are three. Gladiator, because it has everything I want in a movie and the portrayal of strength in the protagonist is inspiring. The Last Samurai because samurais are cool. Also, the main character encounters a completely different culture with respect. And Willow, because it was the first fantasy movie I ever saw and it is just an all around good show.

Favorite Dad moment?:I don't know if there is a favorite because there are so many. The delivery room was really an intense moment, but I also love all the quiet moments as well, like his first laugh, blowing kisses, and learning to walk.

Favorite Date Memory?: I just love those moments when, after we have ordered our food that we know is going to be delicious, and we can reach across the table and hold hands and make eyes at each other.

What does it mean to you to be a father?: It means everything is done for him (Atrion). Making sure he has an example to follow, that he is as happy as can be, and that he is protected.

What does it mean to you to be a husband?: It just means happiness. Always having love, support, and friendship.

Why did you choose me?: Because you are perfect for me. (I melted into a puddle at this point of the interview, then he said:) Plus, you're a hot red head. :)

Favorite Quotes: "Be not afraid of greatness", "Not all who wander are lost", and "None is so great that he needs no help, and none is so small that he cannot give it".

Number one goal to accomplish before you die?: I want to write stories that my son will be proud of.

So folks, that is my husband in a very small nutshell. He is amazing and I love him so much. He is perfect for me as well, and I am proud that he is the father of my child. Also, did you see his smoldering gaze..........

Oh My Melting Heart!

2011-06-29T22:12:00.003-06:00

Okay all, first things first!
Good Things:
~Visiting Teaching! Woot!
~Snuggled with Atrion in the morning and after his nap
~Signed up for Level Pay after getting a depressing energy bill
~Got an EIN
~Washed sheets and pillow cases
~Took an extremely long shower

All the cares seem to just wash away when you take a long shower, huh? I knew you'd agree.
Is it just me, or do these pictures melt hearts?

Yes, he is splattered with a bit of chocolate, but he is so sweet sitting there all sweet and cute.

Chit Chat Tuesday

2011-06-28T21:34:00.002-06:00

Tonight was the Chit Chat Tuesday for our ward and I had a great time. I brought a dessert that I found on the WeightWatchers recipe. All it is is blueberry pie filling and angel food cake mix. Stir it together, slop it in a pan and cook for about 40 minutes (the recipe said 30 but mine sank and I had to cook it more when I got to the church). There were tons of goodies that everyone brought and we had a great time eating and chatting. We also did a white elephant gift exchange. I ended up with a gallon bucket of blueberries that were picked fresh out of a sisters garden. So excited about that because Atrion loves blueberries and the ones at Walmart were all pruny and shriveled so I didn't buy any.

I stayed around for about 4 hours and just chatted with a few of the other sisters. it was a nice break to be around all women who are all going through, or who have already gone through, what I am going through with kids and family and all that wonderful stuff. Oh, I also learned what a brown recluse looks like up close.

I am not sure what kind of mother I would be if I didn't have the gospel to guide me. I am sure I would love Atrion, but I also don't think I would be as happy or as healthy and that definitely would affect Atrion and my marriage. Knowing that I am sealed forever to them gives me a different perspective on life then I would otherwise have. I love it.

Here are my happy accomplishments today:
~Went to Chit Chat Tuesday
~Paid Josh for his hard work. He is awesome.
~Got our tenant requests done.
~Played blocks with Atrion.
~Family grocery trip
~Made a dessert that I can eat guilt-free.
~Cleaned the house really fast even though I didn't want to at all.
~Did not eat out even though I was starving, but I knew I would feel bad later since we have good food at home and a car full of groceries. Cody was happy about that.
~Took pictures of Atrion and Cody. I need to do that more.

Goal for tomorrow:
Eat lean to offset the food I binged on tonight and STUDY!!!!

Can I get a "What?What?"

2011-06-26T21:23:00.002-06:00

Good things today:
~Went to all three church meetings and got to feel the spirit and participate. I even got to hold two babies and take care of sweet Elana (Laura will correct my spelling).
~I made some creamy chicken soup for lunch/dinner.
~Took a nice nap (again). :)
~Drove with Cody and Atrion to set off another set of bug bombs in the trailer (keep your fingers crossed that it kills all of them).
~Talked with Shy for a bit and laughed about stupid, crazy tenants.
~Giggled with Atrion about Bob the Tomato.

I had a great day today. I love my family and am so glad we are healthy and happy. I am thankful that Laura and Josh are close by. Without them, I have no clue where I would be in life.

Goal for tomorrow: Get trailer rent ready.

Eh.

2011-06-25T21:27:00.003-06:00

I'm feeling a little...eh. I decided I had better change my attitude pretty guick before it carries over into tomorrow. So here is my "Good Things" list for the day.

~Woke up and took Atrion for a stroll around the park and down the street a little bit. It was a good twenty minute exercise and made me feel happy. Atrion had a good time too.
~Had a nice, long nap.
~Watched Carter (my nephew) for a couple of hours so Laura could grocery shop in peace and Carter could entertain Atrion for a bit. They had so much fun together. What good kids.
~Read up on some really good blogs.
~Did a little, eentsy, weentsy bit of studying.
~Had a great dinner with my family. I saved up WW points so I could splurge on some yummy chinese food and a krispy kreme donut for dessert.
~Snuggled with Atrion.
~Made my bed, and did dishes.

Goal for Tomorrow: Be committed! Go to all three classes in church.

My New Favorite Thing!

2011-06-25T19:10:00.002-06:00

Perrier and Mi0. So delicious. So refreshing. So fizzy.

Did I mention its 0 calories, 0 carbs, and 0 weight watchers points? Oh, yes.

OH, THE HORROR!!!!!

2011-06-24T16:33:00.004-06:00

This is what Cody and I had to deal with today. It's a great story...

So we bought a trailer for a pretty good price and went to Home Depot to get some paint and other things so we could get this baby rented out by Monday. We lug all the bags up to the front door of the trailer and unlock it. My first thought is, "Oh excellent! The AC does work. This won't be so bad now." The next thing I notice is how the floors and walls seem to be moving (shudder).
We brought one small jug of Home Defense spray with us. Silly, I know. As my mom stated on the phone "A trailer and bugs in the south just go together." Well, we put on our gloves and took a quick scan around. I got to work on spraying the kitchen while Cody got a garbage bag and headed down the hall. I can see things on the floor that aren't moving that I assume is dirt or crumbs, and I can see a few roaches crawling around- not so bad. I aim for those bugs and suddenly all the spots I thought was dirt and crumbs start crawling around scurrying for safety. This makes me squeal and jump back onto the entryway carpet which shifts a bit and MORE come pouring out from under there. I ran to the safety of the wood floors in the living room clutching the handle of a broom and the sprap bottle ready to squash anything that comes near me. That's when I turn and see a monstrous spider trying to blend in to the baseboard. It got scared when I screamed and jumped a little which made me do the run-in-place-and-flail-arms-while-screaming. I yelled to Cody "WHAT KIND OF SPIDER IS THIS?!?!" and he replied "PROBABLY THE SAME KIND THAT IS BACK HERE!"
He then surfaced next to me and squashed my spider nemesis. Then he took the spray bottle from me and started to hose down the kitchen some more. Meanwhile,I am getting light headed and feeling like I might faint, but the only thing stopping me is the the thought that if I did faint, I would be right next the creepy crawlies. SO I ran outside and leaned against the railing on the porch. Unfortunately, underneath the railing was a wasp nest, so I had to fight those too. Then I held back tearsand put my head between my legs so the blood would flow back to my brain.
My dear, sweet, wonderful husband came out to me and told me I should go to Home Depot to get some bug bombs while he stayed and kept spraying. I would have kissed him then if he wasn't standing so close to the door to the bug palace.
Instead I abandoned my weapons and ran to the car, making sure to check my hair, pants, shoes, and other crevices for any sign of stowaway bugs. Then I booked it out of there. I got to Home Depot, grabbed two boxes of bug bombs and some RAID, as well as a FOCUS Vitamin Water (I was going to need all the help I could get). When I got back, I slowly climbed the steps and took some deep breaths to prepare for going inside. Just then, Cody comes booking it out and shuts the door behind him. He is pale, sweaty, and a little intense looking. "You do NOT want to go in there."
Now, I am the wuss in this marriage. I cannot stand bugs. No matter what type except for butterflies and lady bugs as long as they don't land on me or come in my house. Cody tolerates things very well and can handle buggy situations. So this startled me a bit and made me feel queasy all over again.
I asked what happened and he said he had been spraying bugs the whole time I was gone (30 minutes), and that he just had a boss fight with the biggest roach he has ever seen.
He was standing in the kitchen spraying bugs when something caught his attention down the hallway. He squinted and looked and wondered why there was a bird in the trailer flying towards him. He stepped around the bar counter and went towards it to see if he could let it out, when he realized it was not a bird at all but a big, huge, nasty, cockroach that has no earthly business being that huge. Needless to say he pulled out the bug spray and shot it down. It was a hefty thing and seemed to
have a vendetta against Cody for killing off it's family members because it just kept on coming at him...literally it went right for him. And just like in the alien and bug movies, it died just as it got to him. Barely. I saw it. I saw the corpse of the largest cockroach I have ever seen. It was hideous to behold.
We set off bug bombs, drove home, and showered.
And now we can't quit shuddering.

Good Night

2011-06-23T21:44:00.002-06:00

For the past week or so, I have been making a list before I go to bed of all the good things I accomplished during my day. The point of this exercise is so I focus on good things and try to destress, since, by nature, I tend to stress a lot about insignificant things like laundry, or buying ANOTHER tube of chapstick (I just couldn't help it, I am an addict). I also feel like I don't accomplish much in a day and it tends to depress me, so by making this list I am able to actually calculate how I did and set a goal for the next day. Instead of doing this list on my notebook paper, I am going to try and do it on my blog.

*Stayed home ALL day (aka...didn't spend any money, which is great)
*Watched a show with Atrion and Cody
*Caught up on laundry
*Watched nephew Carter for a few hours (He's hilarious)
*Relaxed for the whole day(besides laundry) and enjoyed every minute of my family
*Read "Heckedy Peg" to Atrion
*Ate two meals as a family at the table
*Read scriptures
*Prayed as a family and individually
*Had lots of Atrion snuggles and kisses and hugs
*Played tools with Atrion
*Tracked my WW points honestly even though I felt like lying, which no one would ever know but me and no one would ever care but me so I didn't lie
*Organized charger cords (Thank goodness, cords drive me crazy)
*Took out the garbage
*Checked the mail

Goal for tomorrow:
*Get trailer Rent Ready! (Painted, electrical problems fixed, sink fixed, bug bombed)
*Eat healthy snacks instead of gummy worms :)
*Study

A Nice Day

2011-06-21T21:01:00.004-06:00

Today was a wonderful day! It was overcast, rainy, and slightly cooler than normal. The humidity made it feel a little sticky, but we still went out for a jaunt in the park. This picture is why I love the south.

It is so luscious and green and beautiful! You would have to drive many, many miles in idaho to get to a place that was this forested. We drove 2 minutes. It's a cute little park that sits behind the Walmart and has a fitness trail and a lot of fun shapes and colors that keeps Atrion interested and excited to keep walking.

This is Atrion's little ritual whenever we go anywhere. He HAS to have his blanket, his bink, his sippie, a book, and Bob the tomato. I think in this picture we managed to escape without Bob. He then gets all buckled in and no matter how hot it is, he drapes the blanket over himself, immediately throws the sippy cup on the floor and then relaxes while the rest of us get settled. I think he is adorable.

These are some shots I got from the park. Some are blurry and his hair needs trimmed, but he is just so precious. I love him so much.

We have kept our little "Family Movie Night" tradition. We watched "The Princess Bride" today. Atrion's favorite movie that he watches over and over again is Veggietales Live Silly Songs. He can sit through other movies for about 25 minutes at the most, and then he tries to put his dvd in. We have now only two working veggietales videos because he scratched the others up so bad. I have to hide them from him now. In this picture he has his DVD case, a cup of blueberries for his snack, and lots of comfy pillows to lay on. It's so nice to snuggle up as a family. I think these pictures are from when we watched "Wall-e" actually. He watched that whole movie and really likes Walle.

A Much Needed Post

2011-06-11T20:37:00.012-06:00

Here is a brief picture blog of our happenings over the past few months. Enjoy! Hopefully I won't get so far behind again.

I took Atrion and Carter to the Children's Museum in Memphis. They had so much fun. Atrion loved anything he could push buttons on. The cop car was fun and they could turn the lights on and off.

This is a regular ol' car but Atrion got to pretend to drive it around. He was really happy and having a lot of fun, but everytime I got the camera out he got subdued. I think he's camera shy.

This is the cockpit of an actual airplane. It was really cool!

Atrion has found his favorite cartoon and cartoon character. He loves VeggieTales and his favorite is Bob the Tomato. He walks around saying "Bob! Bobby!" and carrying his book and Plush Bob around. We accidentally left Plush Bob at Laura's house and so I had to draw him one on paper and he slept with it all night long. He even preferred that one over the plush one for awhile as well. I don't have a picture of it yet though.

Some of these are from our first Easter away from home. Others are of the zoo, Carter's birthday party, random pics of Atrion's goofiness, and playing at the park.

Bold Voyager

2011-03-17T10:14:00.002-06:00

On Monday, my little family and I set off for our own little adventure. We are moving across the country to chase our dreams and find our place in the world. Laura and Josh are already there and we are so glad we will be able to spend more time with them.
Hernando, Mississippi is absolutely a charming little town. I almost didn't come home from my vacation when I went to visit. I looked up "Hernando" and it means "bold voyager" in Spanish. I like that. I want to be bold.
I have had several people ask me if I am sure about this. They love us. They are worried about us. I am sure about this. I feel so good about this move and the things we are going to accomplish. I am so happy that we will be able to spend more time together as a family. I am grateful that it is warm there and that they have a Walmart.
We will miss our families in good ol' Idaho so much it aches to think about. So I try not to. I hate goodbyes so don't feel bad if I don't say it or try to avoid it with all my might.

When the dog bites....

2011-02-13T13:51:00.009-07:00

I told Laura that I would do a post of my favorite things. I think that was three days ago and I am just now remembering to do so.

My favorite things don't change all that often but here are a few of my most favorite things right after family, friends, the Gospel, and my testimony. :)

My Kindle. Right now I have about 300 books on it and it has the capacity to hold 1200 more. I even have a few games on it. I love that you can share books now, even with someone who doesn't have a kindle. I use it for my book club and everyone just downloads the book to their computer or iTouch to read it.

Speaking of iTouch...that's my next favorite. I use this portable device to check my email, facebook, rule Bejeweled Blitz, google random factoids, and play games galore! I just love it. Plus, I have all my favorite songs on it.

I have been in a very crafty/cooky mood lately. I enjoy looking at people's blogs to come up with new ideas and twists on the same old things. Which is why my next favorite is a two in one: craftgawker.com and foodgawker.com. These sites have a bunch of thumbnail pictures streamed in from millions of people's blogs. You can quickly browse until something sparks your interest and you have access to that person's blog with the tutorial or recipe. Love it!

The next thing is a deliciously sweet smelling lip balm from C.O. Bigelow. It smells like blueberry lemonade and reminds me of summer. Plus, it works flawlessly. Bath and Body works is always having a buy 2 get 1 free and I always take them up on that. Well, not ALWAYS...but when I run out I do.

Next is my bed. I LOVE my bed! I never want to leave it. I have comfy pillows, comfy sheets, comfy comforter, comfy mattress with a comfy mattress topper. Also, the handsome guy laying next to me isn't so bad either ;). My bed became complete once I got this mattress topper:

I have been working part time for Dr. Randall who is a chiropractor in Pocatello. He is amazing at what he does and really takes the time to educate his patients. I got care while I was working there and it has helped releive so much of the daily discomforts I just thought were normal. My headaches have completely disappeared, my IBS is minimal if at all, my normally achey hips and legs are just fine, and my TMJ is nonexistent...well the pain in my TMJ that is. I also have been in a better mood and haven't gotten the flu and strep that everyone else seems to be getting. (Knock on wood) I like holistic healing and not just popping pills to keep away the pain. Chiropractic is awesome.

Lastly, my favorite things are trailers. I love trailers. They are cheap. They are easy to maintain. And I can rent them out for the same price as a house or apartment. You might see something else when you look at a trailer, but I see dollar signs.

Where did you live when you were going to college?

2011-01-29T21:38:00.001-07:00

When I first attended Idaho State University, I lived in the Redfield dorms on the third floor, second to last dorm on the left side. My roommate was Nikki Bishop, who turned out to be awesome. We got along so well. I also had dorm neighbors who went to my highschool and some other girls turned out to be really cool. The boys side of the dorms were connected by the common rooms that had a pool table, computer lab, huge TV and wraparound couch, and a study room. We had our meals in the other dorms called Turner Hall. It was a feast every night! There was always a large selection plus a salad bar, hot dog bar, grill, and soda machines. Oh yeah...ice cream too. Luckily, we also had a gym pass.
I love my dorm room. It was so comfy cozy. I had a few plants and lots of knick knacks from home. I had my Cat Stevens, Led Zeppelin, and Orlando Bloom posters. I had my favorite books, and a brand new sheet set. Eventually I got a little TV that Laura and Josh won for me so I could watch CSI all day long. Nikki had a computer so I could use that if needed.
Laura and Josh lived just across the massive parking lot so I could venture their way to do laundry when I needed. Plus, Laura surprised me by decorating my room on my birthday. I love my sister. She is so thoughtful.
The ward on campus was amazing. Bishop Kirkham was so sweet. He made a big impact on my life because he always reminded me who I was and how much potential I had.
After the first semester, I moved into University apartments that were single bedrooms. This is where that life started to crumble. Nikki's nonmember boyfriend started to stay over in our apartment (in the living room, at first) but then they slept together on the bunk beds that we share. As far as I know they never did anything, but him being their literally drove me out of my own house. Luckily, I had met some new friends and went rock climbing a lot and even toured the city with another group of friends. I got a job at Taco Bell and started making a little more money. I did okay in school and kept my grades up. Then a miraculous thing happened. I found out about Myspace. A little while later, I got a message from a certain hottie name Cody. I had never seen him in my life. But my roommate had in the first semester. He knew my roommate who was posing with me in my profile picture and got curious as to why he didn't meet this cute red head.
Shortly after that, my parents gave me the old family vehicle, I moved in with my sister across town and started dating Cody. I was used to living in small spaces so my room was pretty huge in comparison. However, me and my sister CANNOT live together. I am not sure why, because we are best friends. We perservered for awhile, and they were very nice to put up with me for so long.
Laura was there the first time I met Cody in person. We had come up with a code in case I wanted her to save me from a horrible creepy guy, or if things were going great and she could stand down.
I quit Taco Bell a little while later. Then got a stupid job at Convergys. Moved into an apartment with Shyanna (Cody's sister)who lived in the building next to Cody's apartment. Shyanna and I became instant friends and then eventually best friends. This time in my life is one that I have the fondest memories of. I didn't work at Convergys very long, tried Walmart but quit because I wanted to go to Warp Tour. Then got a longer lasting job at Great Harvest.
This created a very stable environment for me. I had great friends, a love interest, a wonderful ward, family close by, a stable job, school, and my health. We made 3AM trips to Walmart for groceries, played frisbee at midnight on the quad, took long walks that sometimes led to the awesome graveyard, and ate snow cones at Ross Park. We played racquetball, went to school dances, had slumber parties, and just had so much fun. There was definitely boy drama all throughout, but it ended well (three years later.....).
It was a fun time and I wouldn't change a minute of it. Except maybe taking more pictures.

Mother's Journal- Tell Me About Your First Job

2011-01-29T21:26:00.002-07:00

When I was 15 my mom came homw from grocery shopping with a Papa Murphy's pizza (Garlic Chicken to be exact). She told me that they were hiring and I should go put in an application. She had even brought one home for me to fill out. This not so subtle hint that I needed to start pulling my own weight frightened me a bit since I had no idea how to even put in an application. Plus, I really did not like that Garlic Chicken pizza.
The next day, after receiving tips from my mom and sister, I walked into the store and asked to speak with the manager. Luckily, Dave (the owner) was there and took my application. I said I would love to be considered for the job. Then I left.
Of course I got called in for an interview since no one can resist my incredible charm (harhar).
It was nerve wracking and exciting, but I must have made an impression because I was basically hired on the spot, even though I wasn't 16 yet. Apparently there is a law that says no one under sixteen can go in a walk-in freezer.
It was a bit challenging at first since it is a very fast-paced work environment. It was fun though and I turned out to be an excellent pizza artist. I had to memorize all the toppings on all the different specialty pizzas. They have stuffed pizzas and calzones that I had to learn how to make and fold the dough just right. After awhile, I was a superstar and really impressed my boss. He said I made the best stuffed pizzas because I had a beautiful way of folding the crust. I still remember that there are 80 slices of pepperoni on a family size Pepperoni pizza. Blech...too much.
I love the smell of Papa Murphy's now because it reminds me of a simpler time, before I became a more responsible, mature adult who works hard. I did not like to work back then. In fact, I think I gave my two weeks notice because of track practice but ended up not even going back in. Such a teenager thing to do.
There was even a time when my sister worked in the co-owned coffee shop that shared the kitchen with Papa Murphy's. That was kinda fun.

Motivation

2011-01-22T21:22:00.002-07:00

I have a mentor who is teaching me a lot of things. One of the most interesting things he has taught me lately is about the Motivational DNA tool created by Tamara Lowe, author of "Get Motivated". Essentially, everyone is motivated but everyone is motivated differently. What may motivate others might actually de-motivate me. It's been a great tool to use in many facets of my life, especially with my marriage. I had Cody take the test and we talked about how our different DNA's make us very compatible as long as we respect and understand our differences. Here is my profile synopsis for your viewing pleasure. Also, if you want to find out your own type here is the link: http://www.getmotivatedbook.com/Test.aspx

Casey’s Motivational DNA Type is: PSE
(Production-Stability-External) The Chief

Chiefs have a strong desire for tangible results combined with a need for precision. Chiefs are determined and strong-minded. They are independent and able to work unsupervised with good result. Chiefs can make quick decisions, but prefer to do so when they first have all the facts. Chiefs enjoy having the authority to chart their own course. They have considerable organizational ability and are able to develop systems and procedures. Chiefs feel validated and esteemed by tangible benefits. They methodically work toward goals that offer significant rewards. They are “mission accomplished” people with a need to achieve specified objectives.

PSE Motivators: Autonomy,recognition by superiors, special privileges and freedom from controls, ability to structure their environment to their liking, time to think, power to act and acknowledgement of their special skills and achievements.

PSE De-Motivators: Perceived rigidity of supervisors or authority figures, insufficient systems and ineffective people.

1. Consistency is essential for your motivational type. It’s better to do a little something toward your goal each day than to have a series of starts and stops.
2. Clearly define your goal, break it down into manageable chunks and set a deadline for completion.
3. From the outset, plan rewards for incremental achievements—and make sure that they are significant and highly desirable.

List One Special Memory About Each of Your Brothers and Sisters

2010-12-28T20:39:00.003-07:00

Nathan: A memory of my oldest sibling and brother, Nathan, is from when I was in my teens. I went through a phase where I acted out a bit and pushed my boundaries. I was in 11th grade and didn't know who I was or, perhaps more accurately, if who I was was the person I wanted to be. I got caught sneaking out of the house in the middle of the night (on school nights no less). I wasn't doing anything horrible but it really worried my parents. I had made a "bucket list" of sorts at the beginning of 2003. I wanted to accomplish a lot of things before I graduated high school and became an official adult. I wanted to take advantage of my youth. I died my hair blue, got henna tattoos, visited every single park and played on the toys, spray painted the school rock, went on a road trip, tried to sneak into the underground house, and, yes, sneaked out of the house.
AFter getting caught for the 3rd time, my brother sat down at the talble with me and told me that he loved me. He told me that I didn't have to do things like that to prove who I was and that I was a daughter of God. It was wonderful to hear those things and even made me cry because I love my big brother. Now he is a big, strong cop (detective) with a wonderful wife and sweet little daughter. He is always fun to be around and has a smile for everyone. Love you Niff. Thanks for those wonderful words that have always stuck with me.

Laura: I have a lot of memories of Laura. It's hard to choose. I remember a night when she was home from college before she got married. I was up late for some reason and she came home after spending time with her friends and Julie was with her. We all sat in the living room laughing our butts off about things and giggling about random things. It was always fun when I was included because we make each other laugh a lot. When she left for college was about the time when we became friends. We didn't fight as much and she was always there for me to talk to about boys and high school drama. She even sent me presents at school and made me feel special. I don't know where I would be in life if it wasn't for my sister. Because of her I met my husband, have the job that I have, the ambitions and dreams that I have and the bestest friend anyone could ask for. I love you Lurlen.

Jacob: Jake will always hold a special place in my heart. It's hard to think of him as an (almost) adult and not of the small, shy kindergartner I remember. Once Laura got too old to play with me, I turned to Jake who is 8 years younger than me. We would basically parallel play because I wanted to play more feminine games like House or dolls or cooking and he wanted to beat stuff up. So we comprimised. I built houses for my beanie babies and he would play drive them around in his GI Joe jeep and be the bad guy. I remember coaching his basketball team when I was in 10th grade and he was so sweet. I know it was hard for him sometimes because I could be tough and at times not know what I was doing, but he handled it well and was a good sport. They were all so cute running around the basketball court and shooting the ball. Now, he is a great friend and we love having him visit and geeking out with us about games and funny movies and shows. I love you Jacobi.

I love my family.

Describe your Grandparents' houses.

2010-12-18T22:58:00.002-07:00

I was born in Mississippi and lived there until I was three. I don't remember much about that time except a few random recollections. My granparents on my mother's side lived in the same town and we would always go visit. Once we moved to Twin Falls, Idaho I didn't visit them again until I was 8 and my Grandpa was dying of lung cancer.
I remember the smells the most. My grandma;s house smelled like cooked black beans, coffee, and a hint of cigarrette smoke. It didn't smell bad by any means. Not to me. In fact, I love the smell of coffee because of this memory, I think. It is a comforting, homey, southern smell that makes me happy to think about. It also triggers a flash of images and other things from early on in my life before my memories got stored properly.
My Aunt Diana and her family lived right across the street from my Grandma. They had a neat blue house with a basketball hoop. I remember lots of trees and the humidity. I also remember the Sonic restaurant behind my Grandma's house and outside always smelled like tator tots.
My Grandma had a comfy, cozy living room that all of us cousins hung out in and had mini slumber parties. A lot has changed since then, but these are really strong memories for me that spanned about a month or less in time.

My grandparents on my father's side live in the Hollister area of Idaho. They own a lot of farmland and live way out in the middle of nowhere. I have a lot of memories of playing in the numerous treehouses, forts, and clubhouses that we made in various locations. One in particular was a tuft of tall trees that had anough space in between to have designated rooms for living, sleeping, and cooking. The canal ran right past so it was a perfect location. My and my cousin, Stephanie (and sometimes Shauna, Brad, and Lindsey), would play out there for hours whipping up delicious leaf and mud stews, reed pies, and rock desserts. I remember being obsessed with the movie "Hocus Pocus" and so I would force them to play witches with me. We would brew up some potions and bottle them (we dug out old bottles, pans, and other things out of the burn pile where they dumped the trash) to poison or curse our imagined enemies. It was great.
Inside my granny's house was always some sort of delicious treat that we were not allowed to eat unless we had permission (which usually was after dinner time...this was hard on me because I ate ALL day long at my own house). It smelled like a hint of chlorinated water, dried fruit, and dusty keepsakes.
There were always lots of collectable dolls, dishes, paintings, nativities, Book of Mormon story videos, and old toys. Our favorite inside play things were the tea sets and porcelain dishes that were kept in a special drawer. I was always scared to touch anything because I didn't want to get in trouble, so I would only play with them if my cousin asked first. I never asked, because I was terrified of Granny.
There was always a plastic, grey suitcase filled with old Barbies, and Barbie clothes. The case had a strip of foam in it and we would pretend the case was a big house and that foam was the bed. We would argue over who got the prettiest Barbie with the relaly long, straight, blonde hair. If I didn't get her, I always picked the older Barbie with the curly blonde hair. I think she was from 1950. She had a fuller face than the other dolls.

There was also the TV room that we would go play in. It had an organ, a tred mill, and two recliners. We would play on each of those and then nestle in and watch a movie. I liked the Book of Mormon Stories and Oscar.
A lot of the time it would just be me and my sister and older brother out there while my Dad was working on something in the shop (probably a car since we always had perpetual car troubles). If my Granny was out and Grandoa was helping my Dad, we would loot the cupboards and the fridge and eat like Kings while watching movies.

It was really fun to go out there when I was younger. My Granny made doughnuts around Halloween and that was delcious. We would have many family get togethers around holidays and birthdays and that was always fun. It was a big house with lots of room to gather and be a happy family in.

If there was something I could change, it would be that I could know my grandparents better. I miss my Grandpa Higginbotham. I feel his spirit often and cherish the two memories I have of him. My Grandma Hughes is Alabama and I am so glad that I can see her sometimes and visit. I love her so much. My Silvester grandparents had a hand in raising me and teaching me a lot of valuable lessons. I just wish they were more open to expressing feelings, that way I could feel welcome and want to get to know them more. Perhaps I will make a goal to try and do that more often.

Did you have a favorite bedtime story? Who tucked you in at night?

2010-12-09T20:32:00.002-07:00

I love books. I have always been in love with them since I can remember. My first favorites that my mom would read to me before bed were "Madeline", "Cookie's Week", and "Just Go to Bed!". I also loved Curious George and any Berenstein Bear book. I had quite a collection.
One of my favorite presents I ever received was a book called "Six by Seuss". It was a compilation of 6 Dr. Seuss books. It had The Lorax, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, The 500 Hats of Bartholomew Cubbins, Horton Hatches the Egg, Yertle the Turtle, and To Think That I Saw It On Mulberry Street. These were all great and helped spur my imagination.
I mostly remember my mom being the one to put me to bed and read me stories, but I do have one memory of my dad reading me a story and being sooo funny! He did the voices all crazy and tickled me. Of course, I wasn't ready for bed after that because I wanted to play some more but it was still fun. My dad was always the practical joekster.

I remember living with my mom in Pocatello during the weeks she had school. I slept on one of those fold out chairs made of upholstered foam. They were really popular back then. Anyway, at night she would read a book or two with me and then put me to bed. I would lay there in the dark wondering what sorts of monsters were hiding, waiting to get me. I've always been pretty scared of the dark.
I think I slept more peacefully when I shared a room with one of my siblings. I would hate it when Laura would spend the night at a friends house and I was alone in our room at night. It made me miss her a lot even though we would constantly fight all day long.

Describe what the family living room looked like when you were a child.

2010-12-08T20:58:00.003-07:00

Whew! Is this a trip down memory lane! This house that I have been describing often appears in my dreams. It is the house I lived in the bulk of my childhood. It wasn't an ideal house, but my parents did the best they could. I never really felt embarrassed by it until I went over to some of my rich friends houses that were very extravagant. That didn't happen until about 6th grade though. I only had two friends over to play- Kristin, and my cousin Stephanie. I knew they wouldn't make fun of me or talk bad about me because of my housing situation.
So our house wasn't ideal, but us kids (and probably my dad), really trashed the place. Let me take you on a tour.
Welcome to the Silvester's! Please watch your step as you walk up this fabulous weather-worn porch. Careful, because the railing only goes about three feet across and the remaining ten feet is a free fall (It was only like a foot or less drop, though).

Let's knock on the door here...not too hard, now though because you might get a splinter. Notice the lovely fake plexiglass windows. Very nice orange tint. Alright, step over the threshold and onto the cracked and chipped linoleum entryway. You can see the mud and dirt that has accumulated around here. This denotes a very hard working family not afraid to get there hands dirty. Very good! Oh, and that pleasant warmth is the wood stove to your right. Excellent craftsmanship. Must be well over 40 years old and still in good condition. Except the tin foil repair job half way up the chimney pipe. Very clever fix, indeed. Oh and see the pot of boiling water on top? Yes that serves a purpose for cooling the stove but I never quite understood how. But look at the expertly cut wood lining the wall next to it. Hauling that in was a blast, let me tell you. At least I was too weak to be the chopper. It makes me cold thinking about that. Oh and there is the newspaper box that we used to store old newspapers to make kindling. I learned quite a few tricks from that.

Next to the wood pile here, you see the entertainment center. Our tv was quite large and we had a very nice CD player. Lots of CD's and VHS cases are strewn about though, and I doubt anything is in the right spot. Quite dusty too, and there are a few wood chunks strewn about on the floor by it. Wearing socks is a must. On the TV there is most likely a sports broadcast on or a movie that we repeatedly watched. Seinfeld was a big show in our house, as was The Simpsons. The couch is on this far way kitty corner to the TV. The hallway (if you can call it that)goes between the couch and TV and leads to the bathroom and two bedrooms.
The couch is a pleasant pattern of blue, ivory, and goldish striped. Maybe there was some green too. It is situated right under the big opening into the kitchen. Sort of like a big window, without a window pane.
On the opposite wall of the couch there is another smaller couch and a recliner. These are not fancy at all but are pretty comfy. Behind them is a sliding glass door laden with a heavy beige curtain. The same scene repeats itself on the wall kitty corner to that one. Don't ask me why someone thought to put in two sliding glass doors in the same room, let alone 10 feet from one another. It was probably an 800 square foot house, if that. TWO sliding doors. I mean really?
Anyways, there was also a computer desk that moved around. A dresser with a mirror that ended up in my room when we moved to the new house was also there. It held random objects and all sorts of junk. I think there was a filing cabinet.
But now let me tell you what you would see when you walk in, in a nutshell. Toys, papers, blankets, clothes, wood chips, and all sorts of odds and ends that seem to be seeping from the walls and underneath the furniture. It is a small living room with a lot of furnishings and lots of junk. Whenever we had to clean, basically we shoved everything into a corner and cleared a walking space and called it good.
I almost forgot the lamp. There was no light in the living room so my dad hung an awesome vintagey lamp on a hook that had a chain wrapped around the cord. It had a green bulb cover and was bumpy. Totally rockin!
So that concludes this section of the tour. Please join me next time as we delve further into my upbringing.
Adieu.

How did your mother spend her day?

2010-12-04T12:19:00.003-07:00

My mom is also a really hard worker. My first memories involve me going back and forth with my mom from Twin Falls to Pocatello so she could get her degree and start teaching. I was the only child to go with her because I was too young for school. Instead, I got to go to a wonderful preschool and make a new friend, Jillian, and eat jello jigglers and watch cartoons all day long. Meahwhile, my resentful siblings remember eating burnt creamed corn and getting sent to bed while it was still light outside.
I also remember my mom working dreadful hours at a gas station, but in my head it was great because she could go in the beverage cooler and behind the cash register counter. My sister and I would play "Guess the Prices" when we went to visit her. We would find two items and had to guess which was higher or lower. Sort of like Price is Right.
Once my mom started substitute teaching, I noticed she became a lot happier. Then she got a permanent job as an 8th grade History teacher. She has one grants to continue on for her Master's Degree. One was really prestigious. I am so proud of her for making sacrifices to continue her education and set a great example for me. She always taught me to be my own person, go to church, and get an education. These three lessons are priceless and are still what drive me to do good today. I love my mom!

Where did your father go to work everyday and what did he do?

2010-12-03T23:46:00.003-07:00

My father, Curtis Dean Silvester, has probably worked hard every single day of his life. The first job I remember him going to was for my grandpa (his dad), and it was usually to sit on a tractor and plow a field or change some water. This was when I was very young and either wasn't in school yet, or was in kindergarten and would only go half days. So sometimes I was lucky enough to get to go with him and had my own special seat on the tractor (there was a tire covering that I sat on and held on to a small handle to keep from sliding off... it sounds dangerous but probably wasn't). I remember singing Beach Boys songs like "Sloop John B" and having the time of my life out there with him. I was his special helper.
Then he got a new job at the Sugar Factory and came home smelling like it too. I always had conflicting thoughts in my head because I thought he was making delicious things like candies at the sugar factory, but candy smelled good and he didn't.
Then he switched jobs to drive truck for Watertech. Here he mixed and delivered chemicals for water treatment plants (I think). I remember goingt here after hours and playing with the office supplies and chemical beakers. It was really fun, but probably not what I was supposed to be doing.
After that he worked a brief stint for JB Hunt driving truck long distances, then got his job that he currently has at Standard Nutrition. He bags nutrients for dairy feed and delivers them to dairies all across Southeast Idaho and parts of Utah. He also cleans up the plant and other things too.
My dad is a very hard working, industrious man who never passes an opportunity to help others out with service. He uses a lot of elbow grease to get things done and isn't afraid to roll his sleeves up. I have learned a lot from him and greatly appreciate that example he set for me. I love my Dad.

What were Sundays like as a child?

2010-12-02T22:06:00.002-07:00

Sundays were usually pretty good days growing up. We would wake up and be in a big rush to get everyone ready and out the door in time to make it to Sacrament or class (depending on which was first). If it was 9:00 church, then there were more tired grumbles as we got woke up at 7:00. There were also more tummy aches, and phantom sicknesses. If it was 11:00 church the grumbling didn't start until halfway through Sacrament meeting and all our tummies grumbled from hunger. Sometimes I would make it through Sacrament meeting being content to draw funny pictures on the program or play tic tac toe with anyone willing. Other times I ended up on the floor seeing if I could army crawl my way from one end of the row to the other without getting dragged into the hall and spanked (Note: I only remember being spanked once and it wasn't in church). I did get chastised quite often for doing this and there were many threats about getting a "spankin". Other times I had the privilege of sitting with a friend and we would giggle and laugh and play, until church was over. My friends dad was the clerk and he stayed late after church to do his calling and so I would stay with my friend and we would have the church building all to ourselves until he was done. We built fortresses in the gym with the movable walls, pretended like we were trolls who were scared of milk (if you've seen "Ernest Scared Stupid" then you know what I mean)and turned people into wooden figures, we played hide and seek, and tag. Then we would go over to her Grandma's house where all of their extended family gathered for dinner and conversation and games.
If I wasn't allowed to stay late with Jenny, then my parents usually drove us out of the church parking lot and into a restaurant for a quick, painless meal. This all ended once we didn't live so far out. Then we became real members who honored the Sabbath Day.
(Now that I have a child of my own I can imagine the headaches and stresses it must have been to feed us all.)
Usually we would just relax and everyone could do their own thing for the rest of the night until bed time. Homework was at the top of the list.

What was the silliest things you ever did?

2010-12-02T22:00:00.002-07:00

Hmm, this is a hard one. I was a pretty silly person back in the day. I think probably the silliest (aka stupidest) things I ever did was when I was 19. My roommate, her boyfriend, and another friend decided we were going to drive around town and do stupid things in front of people while someone recorded their reactions. My task was to dress up in a bikini and sun bathe on top of my car in the Walmart parking lot. I had my sunglasses, beach towel, and suntan lotion all set. Did I mention it was in the middle of January? I had a lot of people comment and look at me weird. It was pretty funny because some guy asked if I was from Antartica.
If I saw some stupid girl doing this now a days I would wonder about her sanity and need to for attention. The tape was hilarious to watch afterwards though because of all the back glances and things I didn't notice since I was too busy soaking up the rays.
I think I stayed on the car for about 20 minutes, then jumped back in the car. Brrr!
Aaw the carefree days of youth.

Describe your childhood bedroom. What was the view from your window?

2010-12-01T21:22:00.002-07:00

We moved several times when I was a kid, but most of my memories stem from that same small house mentioned in the earlier post. As I said, my sister and I shared a room that had two windows, one of which was always covered with fiberglass insulation. The other looked out onto our deck and driveway so we could see when people came home or to visit. We could also see a big tree and the dirt road that ran by our house. If we craned our necks we could also see the main road because our house sat at an intersection. There were many times when I would look out the window and see someone run the stop sign leaving a big trail of dust in their wake. That always scared me to death to think that they would be so careless.
Our room was always cluttered and messy with clothes strung here and there and stuffed animals, books, papers, and other various toys and object tossed haphazardly around. I always tried to convince my mom when she told me to clean it that it was an organized chaos and it was best to just leave it be so I wouldn't missplace anything during my cleaning.
We kept the triple bunkbeds in our room when Nate moved in the other one. I slept in the middle and Laura slept on the bottom. We used the top bunk to store stuff and would crawl up there to jump off onto all our clothes and pillows. It was too claustrophobic for either of us to sleep up there. Each bunk had a bookshelf and reading light. Laura's was filled with lots of books that I would occasionaly steal and read. Mine had quite a few favorite books (I was the hand-me-down child so I usually only got stuff when people were through with it, unless it was a special occasion like a birthday or Christmas) as well as some prized treasures like my rock collection and Caboodle. I also had a beanie baby collection going for awhile. Only my most favorite things made it to my bookshelf. I had a blanket that my granny made for me that was dark green with pink, purple, and light blue wavy lines on it that I slept with. I also had a blue elephant, grey dog, and big stuffed teddy bear that was always in bed with me.
the bad thing about triple bunk beds are that if anything falls out the back or sides then you have to really work to get them out because the bottom bunk basically touches the ground. So, of course, the sides and back of our beds on the floor were covered in papers and junk that got lost and fell behind, never to be looked at again until it was being tossed into a trash bag. Well, that's not true, because the mice really loved crawling all over those obstacles. I am sure those memories still haunt Laura since she swears mice used to crawl all over her in the night. I believe it, since I could hear them crinkling papers and wrappers as they crawled around behind the headboard. Poor Laura :).
We also had two dressers. Mine was small and dark with four drawers that were never organized. Laura had a bigger one that was oak colored and usually pretty neat. She kept a collection of porcelain dolls, her caboodle, makeup, and CD player on her dresser as far as I can remember. She always had things that seemed so mature to me like soaps or potpourri or something like that. I had my own science lab on top of my dresser, complete with microscope and slides. I also had a Dr. Dread factory where I made oozes and things that tasted nasty and looked nasty but it was edible and fun to make. I also had my binder where I kept all my secret notes (I wanted to be a spy, so I would practice on my family). I also had a TalkGirl that was so much fun to play with. There was a small TV and a record player on a little stand in the corner between the dressers. Sometimes the nintendo would work, and sometimes it wouldn't.
On the other side of Laura's dresser, my dad built a makeshift closet out of some 2x4's and a metal rod. Pretty ingenius actually. I had about two or three things hung up and Laura took up the rest. Our shoes were either under the hanging clothes or on a shoe rack by the door at the foot of our beds. My dad also made Laura a cupboard out of particle board and she kept all sorts of goodies in there. I wasn't supposed to get into it, but sometimes it was too hard to resist. Especially since she would hoard delicious treats in there. I think we might have had a particle board book shelf in there at one time as well. I can't quite remember. I do remember several posters that Laura hung up (she wouldn't let me hang my cool car poster up). She mostly just cut out pictures she got in Seventeen magazine of cute tv stars like Ryder Strong and Devon Sawa.
When you could see the carpet it was sort of bluish green. The walls were off white. The light was a regular one. I was always in charge of turning it off at bedtime because my bed was even with the light switch. My bed was also even with the window and it was right next to me so I would often peer out once the light was off and tell Laura scary stories about who I saw standing outside. Mostly the "Ditch Man" was out there because he scared her the worst. He was a tall, thin farmer man with overalls and a leather hat the carried a scythe and lived in the ditch that ran by our house. At night he would wake up and creep slowly up the driveway towards our bedroom window. Are you creeped out yet? Yeah, me too.

What was your favorite pastime as a child?

2010-12-01T15:09:00.002-07:00

When I was a child we lived really far out in the country in a small house on my Grandpa's farm land. There were fields, sheds, a garden, fruit trees, climbing trees, and a corral- which made up for the lack of space inside the house. It was a two bedroom, one bath house with an unfinished storage basement and a covered back porch. There were four kids and then my parents in this establishment. At first, my parents and infant brother, Jake, shared a bedroom while the remaining three of us shared another bedroom with a triple bunkbed. Then my little brother got a little older and so my parents got a hide-a-bed and slept in the living room, while my brothers shared a room, and me and my sister, Laura shared a room. This went on for awhile but was pretty annoying for my parents, so they made the back porch into a bedroom for my brothers and then took back the other room. There was a lot of activity, clutter, arguing, and messes inside the house, as you can imagine.
I tell you all this so you will understand why my favorite activities involved being imaginitive and loving the outdoors. I was outside a majority of the time climbing trees and tractor tires and haystacks. I explored the abandoned, haunted sheds and looked for clues to where the lost treasure was buried. I settled into a voyage ship for a long trek across the ocean where I faced turbulent winds and hurricanes. I made forts, treehouses, and club houses in several different locations. I made maps, potions, tomes, menus, paper dolls, and movies. There are still several home videos floating around with me and various friends and Laura making hilarious videos. In the winter I loved to make dugouts and pretend I was living in an ice castle. Sometimes, I would just find a nice place to sit and cozy up with a good book.
All in all, I just enjoyed using my mind and getting whisked away on a different adventure every day.

A Mother's Legacy

2010-12-01T14:52:00.002-07:00

Obviously I have been in a blogging lull. It isn't that I don't have anything to say, it's just that I am too lazy to harness it all and pick a direction. To remedy this, I found a wonderful little journal called "A Mother's Legacy" that has prompts for a mom to write to her children. Since that is the point of journaling and blogging, I bought the book and instead of writing in it I am going to write my answers on here and then go back in a year or two and see what has changed and perhaps start all over again.

Favorites:

~Flower - Roses (any color)
~Perfume - Red Delicious by DKNY
~Color - Gray Blue
~Hymn or Song - I Need Thee Every Hour; "The Best Day" by Taylor Swift
~Book - The Sword of Truth Series (all 11 books) by Terry Goodkind
~Scripture - D&C 76:22-24
~Dessert - Cheesecake without any berries or gunk YUM!
~Vacation Spot - Wolfcreek Resort
~Type of Food - Chicken satay with jasmine rice
~Sport - Volleyball; Discus; Soccer; Rockclimbing
~Leisure Activity - I love reading and I love playing games or watching good shows.

Atrion is One Year Old!

2010-07-09T22:07:00.010-06:00

My sweet, little baby is a already a year old. I keep looking at his baby picture hanging on our wall and marveling at how fast this year has gone by. He is the most amazing person and I can't believe I am priveleged enough to be his momma. It seems like he is learning and accomplishing new things everyday. His determination astounds me. He just keeps trying until he gets it. I learn a lot from this little man. He makes me laugh everyday and brightens up my world.
It hasn't always been an easy road but if I look back on my world before he existed, then I think to myself "What was I doing that was as important as this little boy?" and the answer is nothing. I can be selfish and think "I used to get so much more done in a day" but then I realize none of that stuff was really worth doing. I'm not going to remember how much of the house I got cleaned one day, or if I did all the laundry, or set out something to defrost in time for dinner, or updated my facebook. Nope, I am going to remember the times I stopped to play with my child, and cuddle him, and be close to him because he is growing up too fast and soon he may not let me do those things with him.

This past week has been so fun with him. On Sunday, we had a joint birthday with Atrion and our Nation (4th of July). We went out to Grammie Wootton's with Jake because he stayed the weekend with us. I had made a cake the night before for Atrion to eat and I hated the way it turned out. I was embarrassed that other people actually ate it. Atrion eats stuff off the floor and licks shoes so I knew he wouldn't mind.

From Grammie and Bompa, he got (besides a fabulous birthday venue and delicious food) a front-facing carseat. He loves that!! It also came with a little cupholder and food tray so he loves that too. From Gramma and Grampa Silvester and Uncle Jake he got a punch ball and a monster truck. He didn't get to play with the punch ball too long because Granpa blew it up and it popped a half hour later. But he loves to play with his truck. Aunt Shelby, Uncle Joe, Easton, and Reese got him a very cute outfit and a ball with little squiggly, sticky tentacles that he loves to bite off. I can't wait for him to fit in that outfit! Aunt Shy and Uncle Danny and Kairi gave him some much needed summer PJ's and a toy car that he likes to play with along with his truck. From me and Dad he got a pull along puppy that yips and wags his tail. He doesn't like that so much right now, but maybe soon. All in all, he got some good gifts and we had a lot of laughs watching him eat the cake and open presents.

I was digging through my pictures and wanted to post some of my favorites over the past year. Enjoy.

A Little of This and a Little of That

2010-06-27T15:16:00.002-06:00

Does this month seem extraordinarily long to anybody else? I thought the same thing last year, but I was in my 9th month of pregnancy so I just attributed it to that. However, this month still seems long.
Here's a re-cap of what we've been up to.
My mom held a yard sale at her house in Twin on the 11th and 12th, and we loaded up some stuff to sell there as well. We are sort of tech-heads who have accumulated a lot of electronics such as a PSP, PS2, a TV, and surround sound system that we weren't using. So we thought we'd give the yard sale a whirl and see if we could get back a little return on our investments. Turns out, there is nothing like trying to sell your stuff to make you realize how worthless this stuff really is. Nobody wants to pay you even half of what its worth but since its not in use, shouldn't you take the highest bid even if it's not close to what you want to get out of it? That's not always easy. It's a good lesson though, for us to think about our purchases and maybe invest our money a little more wisely. We did end up selling some stuff and got some money back, but a lot of the things are still at my parents house. Not in use there, either.

On the 18th, Atrion had his first dentist appointment. He has 6 teeth (which are razor sharp, by the way), and they look great. He really loved visiting the dentist and getting a new toothbrush out of the deal.

On the following Tuesday, Cody and I had our dentist appointments as well. I have one cavity, although that word was never mentioned which was strange. I also have a filling that chipped away from my last dentist appointment that they have to repair. Cody, thankfully, has no cavities. I may end up having to get a splint to wear at night so that my jaw relaxes for at least 8 hours a day. My TMJ is not so severe at this point but I can feel it getting worse. It would be nice to not be in pain all day long, everyday.

This week I started my Algebra and Economics class. It is very intimidating because those are the subjects I am worse at. I'm going to try harder to focus though. Wish me luck!

I am so far loving this summer! The weather has been gorgeous, if a little on the hot side. They do the lunch in the park Monday through Friday in the park right out my back door. I have only been once, but I plan to go again.

I also have started working out with some ladies in my ward. They have been doing P90X 3 times a week since November. They meet at the church in the evening, which is great since Atrion is usually in bed by then and Cody can look after him easier. I've gone twice and am so sore that I can barely move. It's great though, because I need the extra support and motivation to keep it up. I can't do P90X, or any video workout, by myself for very long. It's just boring.

Today I went to church by myself because it was such a rough night with Atrion. He wouldn't go to bed until late and then woke up really early. He fell asleep for a nap right when we needed to be leaving, so I just went by myself. That is the easiest thing in the world. I remember grumbling about trying to make it to church before I had Atrion, and I wish I could go back in time and give myself a good talking to! I went to all three classes and even participated since I was able to listen and follow along. The sad thing is that I had to be introduced in both Sunday school and Relief Society because no one knows who I am. I don't blame them at all, since I'm the one that hasn't been going to all my classes and getting aqcuainted with anyone. Just trying to make it through Sacrament meeting is a giant task that takes all of my energy. As easy as it was to attend church by myself, though, there was a gaping hole where my family should have been. I'm going to make a renewed effort to get everyone up and ready for church and there on time so we aren't stuck in the back or out in the foyer the whole time.

I wish I had pictures to post, but alas, I do not.

There will be more though, since Atrion's birthday is coming up and we are doing a combined 4th party and Atrion's 1st birthday party. I love fireworks and birthday cake so this will be awesome!

Father's Day :)

2010-06-21T09:24:00.003-06:00

Thank you for being an amazing Dad to our sweet little boy. I love you!

Battle of the Bulge

2010-06-10T21:20:00.002-06:00

Now that my baby is nearing his first birthday, I figure that it's high time I lost this "baby weight". This has been a struggle for me the past 11 months, but I always just wished it away and hoped the pounds would miraculously disappear as I indulged in cheesecake, pot roasts, and loaded baked potatoes. I'm a pretty active person, who only occasionally sits on the couch with a bag of spicey cheetos. Why should I have to work hard to get my pre-baby body back when so many other moms get theirs within weeks after giving birth?
The truth is, I enjoy food. Alot. Who doesn't really? My fondest wish is to be able to eat what I want, avoid exercise and be fabulous looking with nice abs and buttocks. Alas, that plan hasn't worked out thus far. So I figured it is time for a new plan.
Cody and I purchased the P90X fitness regime in September of last year. We were too exhausted though to continue with it since Atrion still wasn't sleeping through the night (still isn't actually). Plus, it's a fitness program for people who are already in very good shape. So we put it off, and off, and...off. For like, 10 more months.
Then I was on a shopping trip with my gal pals recently and needed to find a nice Sunday outfit for church. Turns out, the only clothes that looked decent on my were from Motherhood Maternity. I'm not a humongous person or anything, but I need the flexi-waste bands and shirts that look slimming. Plus, they were basically the ONLY store to have modest clothes. I hate having to buy undershirts for everything due to the fact the majority of Americans love showing skin.
Well, needless to say I got a little bit sick of myself for two reasons: letting everyone tell me it was okay to eat crap all through my pregnancy, and not working hard enough to quickly lose the weight and feeling sorry for myself about it.
That next Monday, I started the P90X exercise and diet plan. It is really brutal but I lost 4 pounds in 4 days. I gained two back by the end of the week though, so it was most likely water weight. I also felt soo good eating healthy and exercising.
But, it only lasted a week. I allowed myself to take a "break" from my diet on the following Sunday and that sent me into a downward spiral. It's mostly because I watched Julie & Julia and decided that one of my favorite things to do is cook and try out new cuisines. Not to mention eat said cuisines. So in my head, I had already quit my diet and would have to start all over again building my resolve and motivation. I continued to do the exercises though, which is important.
Then after downing 7 or 8 beignetson Wednesday night, I vowed that I would control my eating and not let myself quit. So I joined Weight Watchers. It is a perfect fit so far. I am the type of personality that enjoys tracking my food and planning out meals (when I have the time). Plus, it allows for some indulgence and rewards you with activity points for exercising. Which you can use for food if you go over your weekly allotment of extra points. What more to get you motivated to work out then dreaming of the end of the week when you can eat that extra cheesecake slice or have a meal from your favorite restaurant (within reason of course)?
So, my overall plan is to lose 15 pounds in 3 months. The sooner the better.

My Little Monster

2010-05-31T09:44:00.001-06:00

Dad's Day Off

2010-05-19T09:42:00.003-06:00

Cody played his game for awhile and Atrion helped him out a bit. He loves to sit next to dad and play with his special controller. We may be raising a geek.

These are my boys. I love'em! I'm thankful that we are blessed to be able to spend so much time together.

Cooking with Atrion

2010-05-19T09:07:00.002-06:00

Atrion's new favorite thing is getting into the drawers in the kitchen and testing out each utensil. The wisk has been his favorite so far, although he does love to watch the big spoons spin when he throws them on the ground.

Just Some Things

2010-05-14T10:18:00.005-06:00

Things have been going so smoothly lately. Cody now works for a different property management company doing the same job in the same place, only it seems like a much better fit. Plus, he got a raise and gets an extra day off. Who can complain about that? So we are staying put for a little longer.
For Mother's Day, we went to Twin Falls to see Jake's play and eat some good food and relax. On Friday morning, before we left, Atrion threw up while I was feeding him breakfast. It was the first time he's ever thrown up and it scared me quite a bit. He still was really active and happy after that and wasn't running a fever so I thought maybe he ate something that didn't agree with him or had a food allergy. He tried eggs for the first time the day before, so I thought maybe that wasn't sitting well with him. He was fine for the rest of the afternoon, so when Cody got off work we took off.
We ate at Kiwi Loco and ordered Taste of Thai to go. Mmm those are two of my very favorite places. We got to hang out with Jake before his play for a few minutes and then Nate and Halle came over. Later on, though, Atrion getting more cranky and so I put him to bed. An hour later, I hear him crying and I go in his room and he has thrown up all over everything including his pillow pet. So we get him cleaned up and I take Halle and go to Fred Meyer to get some Pedialyte and fresh pajamas (I only packed one pair for some reason). He didn't go back to sleep until almost midnight. By that time, I was fried.
Then, the next morning, he seemed fine still, so we went to Target and looked around, and had some more Kiwi Loco.
Cody gave me my mother's day present, which was the 1st and 2nd seasons of Friends on DVD. So now my collection is complete!
We were really looking forward to watching Jake star in "A Midsummer Nights' Dream" for his drama class on Saturday night, but Atrion took a turn for the worse and would not stop crying. He also had diarrhea really bad and wouldn't drink anything. I got really worried and decided we needed to pack up and go home. That way, if he got even worse we could take him to the hospital. We got home around 8-ish and I rocked him to sleep, and then started feeling nauseaus myself. I tried lying down and going to sleep, but I ended up getting more sick. I camped out in the Master bedroom (which we use as a guest room/TV room)and stayed there for the night. I ended up throwing up once, which was horrible and then sleeping the rest of the night. On Mother's day, I was too ill to do anything except lay there most of the day. Luckily, I had "Friends" to keep me company. Cody was great and took care of Atrion, mealtimes, laundry, garbage, and other cleaning jobs for me the whole day. It actually wasn't too shabby of a Mother's Day except for the fact that I didn't feel good and was still worried about Atrion losing too much fluids.
I got feeling better by Monday morning. Which was good, because Cody had to leave for a conference on Tuesday for 2 nights. Turns out, we passed the flu bug on to Nate, Jake, Stephanie, and my Dad. And Probably more since they probably gave it to others. It's sucks to be the bearer of the plague.
When Cody left, I went to Costco and got some presents for Father's Day (but also for me too). I got a 22" HDTV and PS3 for the tv room and got it all set up to surprise him.
Atrion and I mostly just hung out at home though since he wasn't feeling top notch. He loves going places and is used to going out for a little while at least every other day. He started going stir crazy and got really grumpy. I think he was really bored with me too. He missed Cody and missed wrestling and attacking him. So it was hard on both of us. He started sleeping so good through the night, though which was awesome and a relief.
On Thursday, I took Atrion out to Grammy's so he could play with cousins Kairi, Reese, and Easton. Sierra, Shy, Kathy, and I took turns playing Just Dance on the wii. That game is so fun! I had to borrow it. Shy is basically a pro at it and gets all the high scores, but it's so fun to do even if you don't get any points. Plus, it's a workout. Some good fun cardio.

Cody got home later that night and barely had a chance to sit down when we had knocks on the door. I hate that. It's the worst to be an apartment manager and get a knock at the door. It basically means that you don't get to relax just yet. Which is what happened.I'm just glad he made it home safe and sound.

I've been trying to work on a sewing project, as well as try my hand at gardening and baking. If I had more space, I think I would take to gardening a lot better. Right now I have a small rectangular planter for some herbs and a pepper plant. I have a little green house dome for some more herbs that I sprouted from seeds. Then I have two topsy-turvys- one for tomatoes and one for strawberries. They are all basically dead except the herbs. I started planting too early I guess because May has turned out to be supremely windy and cold with a few intermittent warm days. Not that I am surprised, just disappointed. There is still time to try again.

My sewing project is hard to complete since my sewing machine has to have cords that are in reach of Atrion's grasp. The only time I can do it is if he is asleep or if Cody can wrangle with him after he gets off work. I am steadily going on it though.

Baking, on the other hand, is so much fun. Plus, it's delicious. I recently made sour cream chocolate chip cookies, which were delicious and so far my favorite cookie recipe.

I made cheesecake brownies with caramel sauce, and I baked some white bread from scratch. I've also tried out some dinner recipes, which I might post later. I am going to try my hand at meatloaf tonight. It might seem easy, but if meatloaf isn't done right, it can scar you for life.

I also got Atrion a toy that he can push and it helps him walk around. I can't think of the title. He absolutely loves it! He has now learned that he can do this with other things too, like the smaller laundry baskets and boxes. I also finally found him some wooden blocks. I have looked everywhere, or so I thought, and finally found some at Walmart. They were probably there the whole time, I just missed them. I wanted to post some pictures of these things but the picture thing stopped working. Maybe later.

Well, I'm off to look at some recipes.

All About Atrion

2010-04-28T11:47:00.005-06:00

Atrion is the joy of my life. He's so funny! No matter what mood I am in, he can always make me smile.
I wanted to dedicate this blog to him (even though every other blog has him in it too).
He'll be 10 months on the 13th of this month! That's so big!! I can't believe how old he is getting. At his last WIC appointment he measured at 22 lbs and 31 1/4". He always gets comments about how tall he is. He is quite tall, but I am not sure its going to be a lasting thing since neither Cody nor I is very tall. Who knows, though. Here is a list of some funny things that he does that makes me smile all day long.
~ scrunches up his little nose when he smiles and gets all snuffy (if you don't know what snuffy means, I'm sorry, but I don't know how else to explain it).
~ Whenever he hears water running, the fridge turning on, the dishwasher switch cycles, or anything along those lines- he sprint crawls over to it in record time to investigate.
~ Whenever he sits queitly for a few moments looking at a book or contemplating a toy.
~ When I go to get him out of his crib in the morning or after a nap, he is always smiling with his one little tooth poking out and he always gives me a love and a kiss.
~ He falls asleep in his car seat with his hand palm up on his chubby little legs and his face squished against his shoulder. That just tickles me when I go to get him out of the car.
~ I walked into his room when he was supposed to be asleep and he was reaching so hard for the books on his book shelf (which I though was far enough away). He had 5 in his crib already and a pile on the floor.

~ He has a little song that he sings when he crawls for toy he is excited about. I say song, but its more of a happy sound he makes.
~ He says "DADADADADADADADADA!" over and over again when he sees Cody.
~ He knows what the words "ball", "bottle", "sit", "No, NO", "Dada", "Mama", "Book", and "Num Num" means. He'll go find his ball when I say "Where's the ball?"
~ He loves to attack my toes and sometimes I will be surprised when a slobbery mouth is suddenly gnawing on one of mine.
~ He's always so happy to be outside even when it's windy. He does little gasping sounds like he's drowning in wind, but he's smiling the whole time.

~ I love when I feed him a bottle and his little hand reaches up and touches my face softly.
~ I love when I read him a book and he laughs hysterically at the voices I do.
~ He yells in excitement at the "Directv" logo that floats across the tv screen when a show is paused.
~ He makes his mouth into a little "O" and says "oohoh" when he sees something new or a toy that he wants to get.

~ I love that every time I take his picture, he makes this face:

Also, that is Cody's picture on the left and my baby picture on the right. Atrion looks more like Jake when he was a baby, I think. :)
I love my baby more than anything in this entire world and I am so grateful for his beautiful spirit and sweet smile. I'm so excited to see him take his first steps and say his first real words. I'm so happy that I have the priviledge of being able to stay at home with him and help him learn and grow and love on him all day.

A Day at the Park

2010-04-23T13:50:00.002-06:00

I have been so excited about the warm weather here! We've been able to go on nice, long walks and take little trips to the park. We were even going to plan a picnic sometime but then the storms rolled in. Maybe tomorrow if it's nice. Here are some pictures of Atrion's trip to the park last week. He really hates the way grass feels, so he actually stayed on the blanket we brought.

Suddenly, everything went quiet.....

2010-04-22T10:27:00.003-06:00

It's never a good sign when things go quiet around a 9 month old, but luckily he wasn't into anything messy or dangerous.

I have never seen him so excited about something. He found these crackers in our little pantry, found a way to get the crackers out, and then had a blast eating them. Good thing they are healthy, delicious ones. He needs some whole grains.
I think he was so happy that he found food himself. It was sweet.

Easter

2010-04-15T13:23:00.004-06:00

On Easter Sunday we went over to Grammy and Bompa's house for a delicious turkey dinner. We had an Easter egg hunt, and Atrion found three eggs! Then there was a special surprise because the Easter bunny came by to visit. It was all very fun and I got to relax for a bit. Cody helped hide the Easter eggs and I thought that was very cute. Our friend Rocky was visiting from Oklahoma, so he joined us for the Easter festivities as well.

Atrion got bubbles a bath toy, and lots of candy (for mom and dad) from the Easter bunny. When he found his hidden eggs, we decided to let him try the marshmallow that was inside. He thought that was just so delicious and wanted more of it. Cute little boy!

Spring Break Part II

2010-04-07T20:17:00.016-06:00

Since I have been so tardy putting this post together, it isn't going to be as detailed as the previous. However, I do have many pictures that should make up for the lack of comprehensive narrating.

Monday, March 15th- After staying up rather late the previous night doing homework and exploring the many fascinating distractions of the casino, I awoke the next morning and decided to take Atrion for a quick swim before we had to check out. As it turns out the pool was on the roof and the wind was a bit chilly so he stayed in the water for less than 3 minutes. Just long enough for me to get some pictures of him.

After that, we all got packed up and checked out, but before we left the hotel we met up with my mom, Grandma, Aunt Faye, and Aunt Diana to have one last meal together. We ate at the buffet that served all sorts of food. There was Asian cuisine, southern comfort food, Mexican dishes, and a meat carving section.
After we ate we waid goodbye to Aunt Faye and Aunt Diana. Then we hit the road to Mobile, Alabama. That is where Grandma Hughes lives. On the way out of town we had to stop at the beach for a few minutes and play in the sand. It was such a nice day and Atrion was very curious about the sand. We were there for about 15 minutes. These are some of my favorite pictures of the whole trip.

It was so nice being at my Grandma's house. She lives in a nice little neighborhood and it was very quiet. She has a nice patio with a porch swing that was absolutely lovely to sit on since I hadn't been able to lounge outside all winter. We ate an awesome seafood feast of shrimp, lobster, crab and oysters. We had a redbox movie to watch almost every night. Atrion wasn't sleeping very well since he didn't feel very good. He had horrible diarrhea from eating different foods that he wasn't used to. That went on for about 3 days and I was exhausted. I had to change his pajamas 3 times in one night. Poor guy. I was seriously contemplating buying a ticket home early.

But things started to look up when we went to the beach on Thursday the 18th. It was not as nice of weather as the first beach excursion, but we had a whole day to relax. Laura, Josh, and Jake rented a waterski and went out on the water for about a half hour. We mostly just played in the sand. Atrion started getting really, really, really, fussy so I had to rock him to sleep while he was screaming his lungs out at me. He still had a rotten tummy, so he started not feeling so good. Plus, he isn't used to being outside for long stretches yet. Since he was so grumpy, this made me pretty grumpy so we packed up and got changed. Atrion fell asleep and so I discreetly changed all of his clothes. He was so adorable.
We talked to a local and found that the best place to eat a Poboy was at Bahama Bob's. I got an oyster Poboy and we split two appetizers between us: fried alligator tail, and fried pickles. The alligator tasted a lot like Winger's chicken tenders with the delicious wingers sauce. They were yummy.

After Bahama Bob's we went to a little amusement park and rode go-karts and played arcade games. Then we headed back to GG's house.
On Friday we drove to Jackson so that we could stay the night and drop Jake off at the airport early that morning. The hotel was the same one we stayed in a week earlier.
On Saturday, Josh took Jake to the airport and then we got packed up to head to Hernando. On he way out of town we stopped at a nice outdoor mall that had stores such as Apple, Charming Charlie's, Anthropology, Lucky Jeans, and a Fresh Foods market. The stores were really expensive except for Charming Charlie's and the food market. I bought Laura a necklace from Charming Charlie's and then went over to the food market and loaded up on deliciousness. I got a tasty roastbeef sandwhich, some coconut macaroons, sushi rolls, and water. That got me through the 3 hour drive to Hernando.
After that, we just hung out with each other and watched movies. On Monday, the 22nd,
we drove to Memphis and stayed the night so that I could just go right to the airport. We had dinner at Uncle Lou's which was on "Diners, Drive in, and Dives" and also "The Best Thing I ever Ate: with my Hands" on Food Network because they have AMAZING wings. The onion rings were also delicious. I got fried okra as well, but that wasn't very spectacular. I also got a cheeseburger that was huge and tasty, but very messy. I really don't like to get messy when I eat so I enjoyed the taste but not the mess.

Josh took me to the airport early Tuesday morning and I caught my plane on time. I upgraded to first class which was nice. I got my own seat and had lots of room. That was a long flight so it was nice to be able to spread out a little bit. When I got to the Denver airport I went to wait for my next plane since it was taking off really soon and found out that it was cancelled due to a mechanical problem. This made me want to start crying since I just wanted to go home. But I bucked up and talked to customer service and got the next available flight to SLC which was with Frontier instead of United. The Frontier plane was nice because it had a tv in the back of every seat, so I got to watch Bobby Flay while Atrion slept.
I was so relieved when I got off the plane and got all my luggage in one piece. And then seeing Cody was the best part. I love him.
I really enjoyed my trip. Despite the fact that I had to sleep through tornado watches(on the 2nd or 3rd night I was there, there was a tornado watch and I had to hide under the blankets), driving tons and tons, and having my planes delayed and then cancelled it was awesome. I love my family and am so glad I got see them. I miss Laura, Josh, and Carter a ton and wish we all lived closer.